bigjohn
Dormant account
- Joined
- Dec 21, 2012
- Location
- Northeast Coastal USA
The short story is I'm back, for the long story please read on.
I realize I made some mistakes, I revealed some character/personality faults that I have but the truth is I miss interacting with the many nice people I have cyber-met here. My biggest mistake was leaving when the going got tough for me (and when I was getting more friend requests in a single day than ever before, TY very much). Some of you stuck your neck out for me and I feel like I let you down. For me that is the the thing I fear the most (more so than someone stuffing words in my mouth) that I let someone down who supported me.
Am I reading too much into it?
Probably so.
Now the long story.
This is the first forum community I have ever tried to be a part of, I'm a more personal type of guy. I'm used to face to face negotiating. No one should misconstrue that to mean I want to fight everybody I disagree with or vice versa, actually, it's quite the contrary. If I'm having a discussion with group of friends and someone starts 'pushing buttons' it is much easier to read the correct course of action when expressions and body language are evident.
I was accused of 'taking it personally'. If you read a few of a certain member's posts you will clearly see they are loaded with personal jabs and insults. When someone attacks me personally I take it personally.
I would like to relate an experience from when I was following my nephew's College Wrestling career which resembles what has been going on here for a while (I have read this forum a lot longer than I have been a member).
Occasionally we would find ourselves in the same venue with the Maryland Terrapins. They had a 'fan' who, to opposing fans, seemed to be the nastiest, most obnoxious guy you would never want to meet. He would say things that seemed tailored to individual opposing fans so as not to sound too bad to the general public but which would really bother his particular 'target'. It was uncanny. People that were on his side would say, "He's really a nice guy...." Underneath all the rhetoric and jabs and insults he may well have been.
The Terrapins originally welcomed him because he generated excitement for their team but his attitude to those who disagreed with him was so acidic that he ended up really damaging his team and the sport as a whole. The Terrapin's home matches were more and more populated only by Terrapin fans. Finally they started discouraging him from being so nasty and acidic and personal. Turns out the man was a retired lawyer (who did some really good things) turned professional heckler named Robin Ficker (google it if you have time) who in the past had worked for the National Basketball Association.
There is still quite a debate among wrestling fans about whether he was paid by the Terrapins to be there or was he there of his own accord.
Either way, when one person or viewpoint decides who is comfortable in a given environment you eventually end up with a very monolithic society. If that is what is accepted here than I am probably just spinning my wheels. I feel that everyone who joins a group of any kind bears a certain amount of responsibility for that group as a whole, the longer you are a member of said group the more responsibility you have.
I have only been a member here for a short time but I have spoken up when another member was, IMO, being wrongly hassled.
I would like to thank anyone who read through this entire post and I hope to continue to add to discussions here with my individual viewpoint and appreciate other viewpoints when they are presented as such.
BTW, I stand by everything I have said here in the past and there is no member here I would not be willing to meet up with for a couple of drinks or a rousing run at a buffet in Atlantic City or Vegas should the opportunity ever present itself.
Now I gotta get to work repairing my profile page and trying to rebuild my friends/contacts list should you guys/gals accept me back.
I realize I made some mistakes, I revealed some character/personality faults that I have but the truth is I miss interacting with the many nice people I have cyber-met here. My biggest mistake was leaving when the going got tough for me (and when I was getting more friend requests in a single day than ever before, TY very much). Some of you stuck your neck out for me and I feel like I let you down. For me that is the the thing I fear the most (more so than someone stuffing words in my mouth) that I let someone down who supported me.
Am I reading too much into it?
Probably so.
Now the long story.
This is the first forum community I have ever tried to be a part of, I'm a more personal type of guy. I'm used to face to face negotiating. No one should misconstrue that to mean I want to fight everybody I disagree with or vice versa, actually, it's quite the contrary. If I'm having a discussion with group of friends and someone starts 'pushing buttons' it is much easier to read the correct course of action when expressions and body language are evident.
I was accused of 'taking it personally'. If you read a few of a certain member's posts you will clearly see they are loaded with personal jabs and insults. When someone attacks me personally I take it personally.
I would like to relate an experience from when I was following my nephew's College Wrestling career which resembles what has been going on here for a while (I have read this forum a lot longer than I have been a member).
Occasionally we would find ourselves in the same venue with the Maryland Terrapins. They had a 'fan' who, to opposing fans, seemed to be the nastiest, most obnoxious guy you would never want to meet. He would say things that seemed tailored to individual opposing fans so as not to sound too bad to the general public but which would really bother his particular 'target'. It was uncanny. People that were on his side would say, "He's really a nice guy...." Underneath all the rhetoric and jabs and insults he may well have been.
The Terrapins originally welcomed him because he generated excitement for their team but his attitude to those who disagreed with him was so acidic that he ended up really damaging his team and the sport as a whole. The Terrapin's home matches were more and more populated only by Terrapin fans. Finally they started discouraging him from being so nasty and acidic and personal. Turns out the man was a retired lawyer (who did some really good things) turned professional heckler named Robin Ficker (google it if you have time) who in the past had worked for the National Basketball Association.
There is still quite a debate among wrestling fans about whether he was paid by the Terrapins to be there or was he there of his own accord.
Either way, when one person or viewpoint decides who is comfortable in a given environment you eventually end up with a very monolithic society. If that is what is accepted here than I am probably just spinning my wheels. I feel that everyone who joins a group of any kind bears a certain amount of responsibility for that group as a whole, the longer you are a member of said group the more responsibility you have.
I have only been a member here for a short time but I have spoken up when another member was, IMO, being wrongly hassled.
I would like to thank anyone who read through this entire post and I hope to continue to add to discussions here with my individual viewpoint and appreciate other viewpoints when they are presented as such.
BTW, I stand by everything I have said here in the past and there is no member here I would not be willing to meet up with for a couple of drinks or a rousing run at a buffet in Atlantic City or Vegas should the opportunity ever present itself.
Now I gotta get to work repairing my profile page and trying to rebuild my friends/contacts list should you guys/gals accept me back.