Who's The Bride (Dead Or Alive) - Who's the robbing bandit, more like

[ChopleyIOM]

Close but no cigar.

TWO landing sites for the wild that'd make a wildline and five spins for it to happen in!

Did it happen?

Did it bollocks! Still, a decent enough bonus round in and of itself.

In terms of playtime though, this deposit has actually been pretty good, can't complain at all really given the volatile nutcase of a slot I've taken on.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Alas that's the end of this one, still no wildline or five scatters. Spins so far to date totals 22,377 and still just over 10% adrift of RTP.

In fairness I got some pretty good playtime off my last deposit but in the end the multiple brides took all my money off me and I got precisely zero fanny out of the deal.

 

[PMKFRUITPRO]

I was fairly lucky on the original DOA1. I was going to row it until I hit a wild line.

Amazingly somebody with my luck hit one in just under 100 bonuses.

Roll on to DOA2 and a completely different story……. Going only for the batshit crazy option.

I recorded just over 740 bonuses without one. With only a few coming close tbh. The best being 11 spins with just one more needed. After that I would try now and again chucking the odd £50 at it on 9p.

I finally hit one last year with a couple of multi’s Going for a nice 11,000X(ish)

I would estimate ( and after the 740 official ones without one it is an estimate) it probably took around the 950-1050 bonuses to finally hit one.

I obviously lost loads on it despite the nice hit. But after the quick spins got taken away I eased off as it’s a nauseating game to play as the base is just so dull.

Still give it the odd bonus here and there but it’s just to dull ti play now I have finally achieved one.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Right then here we go ding ding Round 17 of Chopley VS Butt Fucker.

Anyone else remember withdrawals? I remember withdrawals. It was something I used to do before deciding to chase a wildline on this fucking crapfest.

The good thing about this I can set it to 1000 spins on autoplay and only to stop on wins of 100x or greater, which means I can set it off, and then go and sit on the couch to play Spider Man 2, and only need to look over when a feature starts, watch the feature collapse into crushing disappointment, and then go back to playing Spider Man 2.

I've also been using quick spin for quite a while now, to get the misery over with quicker.

It's a good system.

Oh yes and when did VS nerf the wheels again? I've had a few now and it's always wanky battle tickets for a pound or two, which I don't even know what to do with.

Anyway, onward to wildline victory!

 

[PMKFRUITPRO]

Can you still do the ‘slam stops’ from where you are??

I’d just set up an auto clicker and it’ll be done 100 times quicker.

Even on quick spin all doa games are a compete nause.

 

[Kroffe]

Reported, both of you.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Can you still do the ‘slam stops’ from where you are??

I’d just set up an auto clicker and it’ll be done 100 times quicker.

Even on quick spin all doa games are a compete nause.

Well I'm hoping the deposit will last the evening at least, so quick spin should be about right.

My favourite bonus rounds are the ones where you don't get a single wild for the entire thing.

 

[Kroffe]

Well I'm hoping the deposit will last the evening at least, so quick spin should be about right.

My favourite bonus rounds are the ones where you don't get a single wild for the entire thing.

You dont seem to understand the point of the slot, those are the worst ones.
You want many wilds, or brides in this case.

Also, you should ditch Spider Man and play Balatro instead.
Its a poker roguelike that is a lot of fun, i think it won indie game of the year or something similar.
Good bang for your buck, a lot of content and easy to get into, also offers a lot of complexity and basically endless replayability since every run you do is different.

 

[mulven]

You dont seem to understand the point of the slot, those are the worst ones.
You want many wilds, or brides in this case.

Also, you should ditch Spider Man and play Balatro instead.
Its a poker roguelike that is a lot of fun, i think it won indie game of the year or something similar.
Good bang for your buck, a lot of content and easy to get into, also offers a lot of complexity and basically endless replayability since every run you go is different.

Amen to that. I have made three posts on this forum. One was about Anjouan licences, one was about 419 casino scams and the other one was about Balatro

 

[Kroffe]

Figured i would check if Doa&WTB really are as bad as Chop and PMK say.
I would obviously go for WTB if i could, but im playing with the leftovers from the Runner runner win i got yesterday on coolbet, and despite how cool they are by still using max rtp, they dont have WTB.

Anyway, clearly nothing wrong with DoA or WTB.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

I think this is like the scam where it was always Nordic folks who won the Mega Fortune jackpot on that NetEnt slot, us Brits are just the patsies filling the games up for the Kroffes of this world.

SO BLATANT.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Amen to that. I have made three posts on this forum. One was about Anjouan licences, one was about 419 casino scams and the other one was about Balatro

Oddly enough I can't really get into Balatro, I've played it a modest amount and can see there's a very clever design game going on, but for whatever reason it just didn't click with me.

 

[Kroffe]

Amen to that. I have made three posts on this forum. One was about Anjouan licences, one was about 419 casino scams and the other one was about Balatro

Missed that thread, i just found it when looking for some roguelike games i can play on my crappy laptop.
I was playing Luck be a landlord and Slay the spire a bunch but it was getting a bit stale.

Close to 'finishing' Balatro, only missing gold stake on 2 decks, and also the last challenge.
But i think i might skip the jokerless challenge even if it hurts the completionist in me, it just seems like such a chore to do and theres so much more luck involved to get the right vouchers and cardenhancements needed.

 

[Kroffe]

I think this is like the scam where it was always Nordic folks who won the Mega Fortune jackpot on that NetEnt slot, us Brits are just the patsies filling the games up for the Kroffes of this world.

SO BLATANT.

If its any consolation, i have not won the Mega fortune jackpot yet.

But if we get into conspiracies, before yesterday i have not used coolbet in years, only did because i saw it in a thread about which casinos are still using max rtp, and im running low on those.
Giving me big wins two days in a row is sure to make me come back, right?

 

[Jono777]

Figured i would check if Doa&WTB really are as bad as Chop and PMK say.
I would obviously go for WTB if i could, but im playing with the leftovers from the Runner runner win i got yesterday on coolbet, and despite how cool they are by still using max rtp, they dont have WTB.

Anyway, clearly nothing wrong with DoA or WTB.

View attachment 206986

I'm now almost convinced there is a (not so?) hidden conspiracy to drive me away from this forum forever lolol....

Nicely done mate

 

[ChopleyIOM]

And there's the bust out. What an absolute bag of shit. I have, in honesty, had better experiences in my life for £125 than that.

Today's stats.

Overall stats.

 

[dunover]

To be fair I think a British soldier did win 19.2m on a Mega Moolah but that is MG which is IoM based and don't seem to hate us all like Gnatent do/did.

Those Netent progressives are just a modern-day form of Danegeld on the British people.

(where for periods over two centuries the Vikings were paid protection money by the Anglo-Saxon kingdoms, leaving most of us miserable and broke except the rulers, kind of like today.)

 

[Kroffe]

I'm now almost convinced there is a (not so?) hidden conspiracy to drive me away from this forum forever lolol....

Nicely done mate

Sorry, and thank you.

Its not to drive you away, i only did it to get back at Chopley for his WTB bashing comments.

 

[Jono777]

Despite my ongoing awful play time and ghastly returns on DoA, my love is almost still as strong as yours is for WTB

 

[mulven]

Missed that thread, i just found it when looking for some roguelike games i can play on my crappy laptop.
I was playing Luck be a landlord and Slay the spire a bunch but it was getting a bit stale.

Close to 'finishing' Balatro, only missing gold stake on 2 decks, and also the last challenge.
But i think i might skip the jokerless challenge even if it hurts the completionist in me, it just seems like such a chore to do and theres so much more luck involved to get the right vouchers and cardenhancements needed.

I did all the challenges before doing the stakes which I'm in the middle of. That challenge is all about 4OAK and boosting it up.

 

[Kroffe]

I did all the challenges before doing the stakes which I'm in the middle of. That challenge is all about 4OAK and boosting it up.

Yeah, i figure you need at least 4oak but im also guessing you need to get a bit lucky with arcana & spectral packs to boost your cards and thin your deck out.
Do you have a ballpark number on how many tries it took you?

 

[mulven]

Yeah, i figure you need at least 4oak but im also guessing you need to get a bit lucky with arcana & spectral packs to boost your cards and thin your deck out.
Do you have a ballpark number on how many tries it took you?

Not sure but I know that other challenges took me longer. I did spam restart rounds until I saw two skip rewards that I liked so I could get it off to a good start, that would skew the number of tries but I don't really count those I guess. For real tries probably about 20.

EDIT: actually I think they updated it since I did that and straights are also +3/+30 when they used to be less. Easier to make.

 

[Kroffe]

Figured i would check if Doa&WTB really are as bad as Chop and PMK say.
I would obviously go for WTB if i could, but im playing with the leftovers from the Runner runner win i got yesterday on coolbet, and despite how cool they are by still using max rtp, they dont have WTB.

Anyway, clearly nothing wrong with DoA or WTB.

View attachment 206986

And just as i suspected, nothing wrong with WTB either.
Doa is just a Western themed re-skin of WTB so it makes sense that you can get the same win on both slots.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Person on Nordic IP address and playing with strange money that no one understands wins on dodgy insider job NetEnt game shocker.

You should move over to Mega Fortune I reckon Kroffe, go for the serious money, although I haven't filled that one up for you

 

[Kroffe]

Mega fortune is 25p min bet, im not a billionaire.
Of course if i just keep playing WTB i will be eventually, i might try it out when i reach that goal.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

£100 deposit plus Weekend Booster.

Let's set fire to more money for Kroffe to steal later on.

 

[dunover]

£100 deposit plus Weekend Booster.

Let's set fire to more money for Kroffe to steal later on.

View attachment 207060

Paying more Danegeld then I see....

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Paying more Danegeld then I see....

I'm trying to improve trading relations with our partners in Europe.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Another bust, I guess I sort of got a bit of playtime at least, if we're trying to find a silver lining. Never once I have even remotely troubled being in decent profit or making a withdrawal since I made the very unwise decision to engage with this horror show of a slot.

Needless to say no wildline or five scatters yet.

Session stats:

Overall stats.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

So if we do a bit of maths on this, so far I have wagered £5160 on WTB, at an RTP of 84.67% that means the crusty wanksock has paid out £4369. For a perfect 96.82% it would have paid out £4996.

Five scatters on an 18p spin would pay £450, if you add that onto my £4369, we're up at £4819 which all of a sudden puts me pretty close to T-RTP.

Wildline features are often in 3000x territory, that would be £540, which added onto my £4369 would be £4909 and then all of a sudden we're really close to T-RTP.

So that's what I'm missing here, without a wildline or five scatters you're always going to be badly behind on this game, but of course the inverse can be true and an early hit on either of those in your WTB career will put you way over the top, or just being lucky with them in general - (also known as 'doing a Kroffe' and/or being of Nordic descent) - will have the same effect.

What I think is unusual about WTB is just how far behind you can be, and for how long, without one of those marquee wins. Compare and contrast with Dice Fusion at 3Dice where I managed to be over RTP after 227K spins despite having never picked one of the max prize ~3000x balls out of the bag, this speaks to a far less harsh volatility profile.

New Slot Announcement Post in thread 'New 3Dice slot - 'DICE FUSION', 3Dice does Reactoonz'

Jan 27, 2025

Asked Anna for my latest stats, after 227K spins I'm running at 95.8%, which is 0.6% above RTP.

If I could just land a ~3000x ball I could 'complete' the game and be ahead of the curve!

Game Game Rounds Av Bet RTP
Dice Fusion 227831 £0.2 95.80%

• ChopleyIOM

• 

(Dice Fusion has an RTP of 95.2%.)

So in the case of WTB I will keep plugging away at it, the problem is that there are basically no bonuses at VS for me these days and there haven't been for years. At 3Dice I have the cushion of regular VIP match offers and just reasonably regular bonus offers in general, which takes the sting out of some of my more stupid slotting endeavours.

However at VS it's just me versus WTB with straight deposits, and so far, WTB is winning.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Right off we go again, time for the weekly bonfire of money.

It can't keep this shit run up forever, it just can't.

 

[TheSchwad]

Right off we go again, time for the weekly bonfire of money.

It can't keep this shit run up forever, it just can't.

View attachment 207297

Loving this (not you losing obviously ) but the challenge and the stats.

Is it a £100 deposit thia week, and if so, how do you get so much weekend booster. I get between £1-4 even when I've played loads and had decent wins (assuming it takes a small chunk of winning spins)

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Loving this (not you losing obviously ) but the challenge and the stats.

Is it a £100 deposit thia week, and if so, how do you get so much weekend booster. I get between £1-4 even when I've played loads and had decent wins (assuming it takes a small chunk of winning spins)

It was a £120 deposit, Weekend Booster was hardly bugger all this week.

£100 just doesn't cut it on this game, even on 18p spins. The idea is that it's enough to last the evening at least.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Well what an absolutely miserable shitfest that was. Genuinely most of the depressing online casino deposits I've ever had the misfortune to endure.

I'll let the stats do the talking.

High point of the session was 83x in the basegame. Every single feature was fucking shite.

SESSION:

LIFETIME:

 

[PMKFRUITPRO]

Very bad game.

 

[sufferinsilence]

Very bad game.

@Kroffe , time for an intervention

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Very bad game.

It's almost like a sort of 'mini progressive' game, in that so much RTP is stacked into five scatters/wildline features that if you don't hit either, you're going to be permanently 10-12% behind T-RTP, or in my case a smidge more (I'm 13% adrift after 31K spins).

Obviously it's going to hit a wildline/five scatters eventually, but fuck me it's one tiresome sack of shit in the meantime.

Anyway it's only going to get one deposit a week off me going forward, and that's only because I'm now locked into my stupid determined mode.

It reminds me very much of Dead Or Alive back in the day, which was always an abomination for me even whilst others were eulogising about it.

 

[Reelsoffun]

Welcome to the club chops, although I have never played WTB, I have chased DOA2 for well over 200,000 spins and not had a wild line or 5 scatter and it’s the same for DOA1 as well, given up on the latter but still play DOA2 for the glimmer of hope I finally hit and get some of the 20% RTP I was currently behind, but it just hates me.

While my mate had 2 wild lines and a 5 scatter within 8,000 spins the absolute lucky c***

He don’t play it now as there’s no improvement to be made on that!

It’s the sort of game most of us only play to get the 5 scatter or wild line early, but if you don’t it’s hell on reels…..

Knowing your complete spawn, you will get it at some point no doubt in my mind, and with a game that can pay tens of thousands of times stake your only truly in a hole when you have breached that much in stake behind lol, I like others look forward to your future sessions, just hope you don’t end up in the same position as me!

 

[brianmon]

and with a game that can pay tens of thousands of times stake your only truly in a hole when you have breached that much in stake behind lol, I like others look forward to your future sessions, just hope you don’t end up in the same position as me!

Except he's playing 'Who's the bride' which is only the equivalent of DOA1, so 2500-4500x is about the best you can expect, rather than "tens of thousands of times stake"

Personally, I've given up on Netent games. There's something not quite right since they were moved to the Evolution servers. The feature frequency is way off now

 

[Jono777]

In addition to the above, wild lining DoA is far "easier" than DoA 2 due to potential and volatility.

More or less given up on DoA 2 these days but over the years (no exaggeration) had a combined total of maybe just over 100 w/l & 5 scatters.

Some of the wild lines came late, even on the final spin to be monsters but still a wild line is a wild line

Now the Evo version is a different beast...... Plus I don't play anywhere near as much as I used to so maybe not as clued up to advise as I think I am

 

[Reelsoffun]

Except he's playing 'Who's the bride' which is only the equivalent of DOA1, so 2500-4500x is about the best you can expect, rather than "tens of thousands of times stake"

Personally, I've given up on Netent games. There's something not quite right since they were moved to the Evolution servers. The feature frequency is way off now

Yeah my bad, I was talking about DOA2 even though I know he’s playing WTB, so yes your correct that he’s already near the point of no return LOL

He’s going to need a good wild line, 5 scatter or both soon to get out of trouble.

 

[Kroffe]

The mistake i see many people do is treating it just like any other slot.
Its not just any slot, its the bestest slot, and a little bit of research goes a long way.

I would say good luck but i think we all know its not about luck.

 

[dunover]

It's almost like a sort of 'mini progressive' game, in that so much RTP is stacked into five scatters/wildline features that if you don't hit either, you're going to be permanently 10-12% behind T-RTP, or in my case a smidge more (I'm 13% adrift after 31K spins).

Obviously it's going to hit a wildline/five scatters eventually, but fuck me it's one tiresome sack of shit in the meantime.

Anyway it's only going to get one deposit a week off me going forward, and that's only because I'm now locked into my stupid determined mode.

It reminds me very much of Dead Or Alive back in the day, which was always an abomination for me even whilst others were eulogising about it.

Oh yeah, Blaothon's weekly wildline lol

 

[ChopleyIOM]

Yeah my bad, I was talking about DOA2 even though I know he’s playing WTB, so yes your correct that he’s already near the point of no return LOL

He’s going to need a good wild line, 5 scatter or both soon to get out of trouble.

Even a decent wildline or five scatters won't get me up to T-RTP at this point (I ran the numbers a few posts back) but it will repair a lot of the damage.

It's the classic case of do I cut my losses and call it a day, or continue to burrow into the financial rabbit hole.

Obviously I'll choose the latter But only at the rate of one deposit per week, for everything else there's 3Dice

 

[Jono777]

There's always the chance of a double, or even a treble wild line Chops....

Not wishful thinking, these games can, have and will do it.

 

[mack341]

Version comparison between Chopley and Kroffe so far...

 

[ChopleyIOM]

More fool me I decided to have another crack at this fetid fucking sack of sloppy monkey shite.

It's a new low score!

This was a £105 deposit played on 18p spins.

This kind of sums it up really, free spins round with 12 completely dead spins and no wilds at all anywhere. Pay was just the basic three scatters trigger.

Lifetime total stats to date.

 

[ChopleyIOM]

So here's a thing, I've been playing through Assassin's Creed Shadows, here's my current playtime in the game, 37 hours.

Note this isn't me having finished the game, I'm only about a third of the way through the main campaign, I've been spending loads and loads of time on the side content which I'm finding really fun and engaging.

I paid the princely sum of £39 for the game, a key for the PC version that activates through Ubisoft Connect.

Last night I deposited £105 at VS and Who's The Bride took the lot off me, on fucking 18p spins, in two hours and twenty minutes. Never once was I in profit by so much as a single penny. The whole experience was desperately miserable from start to finish.

You see my point.

This isn't a money thing, insofar as I can easily afford gambling like this, but the sheer fucking waste of money that it represents really, really rankles with me when online slots pull bollocks like this.

Assassin's Creed Shadows looks like this. This isn't a static image, it's a screenshot of realtime rendering from within the game:

Who's The Bride looks like this:

 

[Kroffe]

So one game gives you 72 coins, the other one gives you 0 coins.
And you still think the game that starts with 'Ass' is the better one.

To be fair, Assassin's creed black flag was a pretty cool game.
Just sailing the seas singing sea shanties, good times.

 

[Jono777]

Do your family ever see you mate?