Professor Verb
Dormant account
- Joined
- Jun 6, 2016
PEOPLE I'VE MET AT CASINOS OVER THE YEARS:
Since I usually jam my player's club card in my slot machine's "play" button and just "let 'er rip" automatically, I have plenty of time to observe the people around me. Here's some observations about the kinds of people I most frequently encounter in Native American casinos here in Oklahoma:
"Glenda (or Bob): The Good (or Bad?) Witch": These gamblers constantly rub, slap, talk to, or otherwise massage their slot machine, usually the screen but no part is safe from their vigorous efforts to somehow rub a winner out of a reluctant machine. I usually want to ask them if they are a good witch or a bad witch but am scared of hexes.
"The Digger": These are women who sit down next to me, pull out a purse the size of a suitcase (I shudder when this happens), and proceed to stick their arm into their purse up to the elbow to dig for money, keys (I don't know why), tickets, a player's club card, a snack, their mortgage, last will and testament and God only knows what else. Finding each of these items requires much noisy, time-consuming digging which is especially irksome when they put a dollar or two in the machine, push the button once or twice and cash out a quarter and leave (at least they left). Sometimes they dig money out of their bras -- yikes!
"The Talker": Usually inebriated but not always, this gambler not only loves to talk, he or she is absolutely compelled to do so and will not stop unless or until you die or get up and leave. Be prepared to hear about every win and almost-win these players have ever experienced, as well as every ache and pain they suffer from. When they are losing, Talkers complain nonstop; even when they are winning, they still complain that it's not enough or is long overdue (duh).
"The Printer": These players put $5, $10 or $20 in a slot machine, push the button a few times and then print out a ticket and then put the freshly printed ticket right back in. Sometimes they just press the button once or twice before printing. Print, churn, click, churn. Print, print, print. I detest these people most of all I think, even more than Talkers. No wonder the machines are always out of paper.
"The Winner": These are the gamblers on the immediate right and left of me who are consistently winning while I'm sucking pond scum. I hate it when that happens...
I'm sure you've come across these people as well, but I'd like to hear about some of the unique crazies you've encountered as well.
Since I usually jam my player's club card in my slot machine's "play" button and just "let 'er rip" automatically, I have plenty of time to observe the people around me. Here's some observations about the kinds of people I most frequently encounter in Native American casinos here in Oklahoma:
"Glenda (or Bob): The Good (or Bad?) Witch": These gamblers constantly rub, slap, talk to, or otherwise massage their slot machine, usually the screen but no part is safe from their vigorous efforts to somehow rub a winner out of a reluctant machine. I usually want to ask them if they are a good witch or a bad witch but am scared of hexes.
"The Digger": These are women who sit down next to me, pull out a purse the size of a suitcase (I shudder when this happens), and proceed to stick their arm into their purse up to the elbow to dig for money, keys (I don't know why), tickets, a player's club card, a snack, their mortgage, last will and testament and God only knows what else. Finding each of these items requires much noisy, time-consuming digging which is especially irksome when they put a dollar or two in the machine, push the button once or twice and cash out a quarter and leave (at least they left). Sometimes they dig money out of their bras -- yikes!
"The Talker": Usually inebriated but not always, this gambler not only loves to talk, he or she is absolutely compelled to do so and will not stop unless or until you die or get up and leave. Be prepared to hear about every win and almost-win these players have ever experienced, as well as every ache and pain they suffer from. When they are losing, Talkers complain nonstop; even when they are winning, they still complain that it's not enough or is long overdue (duh).
"The Printer": These players put $5, $10 or $20 in a slot machine, push the button a few times and then print out a ticket and then put the freshly printed ticket right back in. Sometimes they just press the button once or twice before printing. Print, churn, click, churn. Print, print, print. I detest these people most of all I think, even more than Talkers. No wonder the machines are always out of paper.
"The Winner": These are the gamblers on the immediate right and left of me who are consistently winning while I'm sucking pond scum. I hate it when that happens...
I'm sure you've come across these people as well, but I'd like to hear about some of the unique crazies you've encountered as well.
