A TTE TTE with the GOD of the "Winner Screenshots" thread... "SLOTSTER"


Dormant Account
Apr 24, 2005

I'd like to take this time with you, to turn this stone to find out a little more about the one who's better known as...


Starring in...​


avec "johnsteed"​

While I think the handle "Slotster" truly speaks for itself, what does it mean to you?

Well, it’s certainly descriptive of my online antics!! It came about on the spur of the moment really, way back sometime in 2004 sometime (Screen goes all wobbly in a flashback kinda way!)

I’ve been a big fan of the slots in Las Vegas for a good number of years now. I first hit about $700 on Triple Wild Cherry years ago, and was instantly hooked! A few more visits and a few more hits (Wheel of Fortune, Red Hot Sevens etc) later – I started mooching around online for something to fill the gaps between trips!

I stumbled across the mighty "Casinomeister" when I was browsing ‘The Wizard Of Odds’ site just after a Vegas visit, checking out what my odds were for hitting ‘Megabucks’! The "Slotster" name itself however came about when, after a visit to the accredited ‘Gaming Club’ casino, I made my first decent hit on "Spring Break"!! Four "Spring Break" logo’s in the free spins! I made my first post to the "Winner Screenshots" thread, needed to come up with a name - and the rest, as they say, is history!

How long have you been gambling online?

I reckon sometime around early 2004? It’s all a bit hazy… I’m fairly sure I tried a few lottery sites etc prior to that – but mid 2004 “Full time”!

What's the worst online gambling experience you've had?

I’ve been very lucky in that I’ve never really had a dreadful experience or been ripped off or anything – there’s a lot to be said for following that accredited list!! ;) Probably the worst, but more in a comedy fashion, was attempting to decipher the "Casino Rewards" free play promotion – that I was instantly excluded from the minute I signed up J A few comedy emails between me and support, more for sport really than anything else, and I found myself struggling to understand why anyone anywhere would ever play at an outfit like that!

What's the best casino experience you've ever had, with a casino that most of us would think sucks?

I’ve not got one!

As far as I know, I can't imagine there being another "Casinomeister.com" forum member as recognizable as you, who's a higher-roller. I've been dying to ask this question to you, but do you ever up your slot bets to the $45 mark on old favorites such as "Spring Break" or "Thunderstruck"? How about $37.50 on "Tomb Raider" or "Mermaids Millions"?

Hell yes! I’ve got carried away far too many times than I care to remember!!! It’s by no means a common occurrence, but the odd run of maximum bets on all those slots you’ve mentioned is not unknown. I remember hitting the free spins on "Ladies Nite" at 45 a spin within two spins! “Retirement here I come” I thought… Sadly not (about 1200 from memory) – Where are those re-triggers and five ladies when you need ‘em!?!??!!? I’ve hit the spins at top bets on "Tomb Raider" too – similarly no bank breaking figures to report!

It generally happens when I’ve hit something nice at the 4.50/9.00 mark and I’ve got a few hundred quid to play with… More often than not it goes South remarkably quickly!

Craziest is probably the time I was playing over 100 a spin at some stupid "WagerWorks" game about a road trip or something. Took me seven or eight spins before I realized, and (fortunately!) hit a win for about 1000 I got all excited before I realized I’d just wagered almost that in the previous thirty seconds. Yikes!

What's the greatest slot win you've hit over the years?

Ooooh, there’s a few – and most of which are documented on the "Winner Screenshots" thread! The most memorable is probably the strangest hit I’ve had on a game I never really play (and haven’t since!) I was messing around on ‘Treasures Of Isis’ at Intercasino, getting bored that I wasn’t hitting the ‘rubies’ bonus game! With a balance of only about 150, I decided to go for a stupid 20 spin – and hit the rubies straight away… I picked the ‘top’ one on the bonus game – and up popped 8,000! I thought the decimal place was in the wrong place for a good while, before realizing I really had hit eight grand in the blink of an eye…

I’ve had a few great runs at Microgaming casino’s – mainly from the free spins – but the best ‘single hits’ have definitely come from the Crypto’s!

I might save this question till the end of the interview, as I fully intend to hit the "Millionaires Club" jackpot at some point this month.

I read recently - and my number may be a bit off here - but you claimed that 99% of your online casino bets go towards slots. What I'd love to know, was there ever an online game other than anything of a slots variation, that you used to play? Rather, what game got you hooked initially?

At LEAST 99% - probably nearer 100 these days! Definitely remember when I started though… Bearing in mind I’ve always played slots in Vegas, I weirdly came to online gaming through Blackjack and ‘Let It Ride’ at "TotalBet" and "Littlewoods". Used to spend ages making reasonable profits at the blackjack tables, before pouring it all back into 'Let it Ride'! I play ‘offliine’ poker to a reasonable standard too, so there was a little bit of that on the Prima network – but online poker has never really grabbed me as such. As soon as I found Microgaming, it all changed forever!

Which software provider do you feel has made the greatest steps over the past 12 months, primarily in their development towards slots?

Definitely CryptoLogic. Microgaming have the ‘old favourites’ nailed, but Crypto are catching up fast in graphics, entertainment, features, pay tables and gameplay. The "Paradise8" software that came along recently looked promising at first, but it just hasn’t got the playability and professional feel to keep me coming back for more!

I know you're pretty much a die-hard MG fan, but if you could think of any negatives about the slot games that are being developed as of late, what would they be?

Too complicated, too long between bonus rounds and not enough potential when you get them!!! I’m talking specifically about the ‘Cashanova’ style slot. There’s so many lines and so much to look out for – it’s amazing you make so many spins without actually hitting anything worth mentioning!! Plus, and "Simmo!" is going to love me for mentioning this, I too hate the ‘coin’ thing… I mean, how hard is it to just give you the choice of coins or cash like they do in Vegas?! I might be a bit old school, but I guarantee if they introduced a new Ladies Nite/Spring Break style variation – with free spins that multiply if they retrigger – they’d be on to an absolute winner! They exist in Vegas, so make it happen MG! "Loaded" is probably the last great ‘new’ game that MG introduced… The rest have been a bit blah!

Whether or not a perfect slot game has been made yet, in your estimation, what's the pinnacle of any slot game ever created?

Predictable I know – but it’s the MicrogamingFREE SPINS’ lot… I just live for those scatters!

Adding to that last question, I'd love to pick-your-brain to find out what you'd consider the "Top-10" online slot games to be?

Ok, a quick glance at my 32Red ‘favourites’ for inspiration! This changes on a semi-regular basis, but as I sit and speak and in no particular order…

*Loaded (Regular and great feature – with BIG reel winning potential too!)

*Ladies Nite (It’s all about the scatters baby!)

*Spring Break (First big hit for me, fond place in my heart!)

*Lucky Lady (Always done great of the pick-a-planes feature!)

*Millionaires Club 9-Line (Because I’m gonna have it!!!)

*Doctor Love (All what I look for in a slot, plus the rapid fire!)

*The Hulk (Marvel Series) (Great bonus and the jackpot potential)

*Cleopatra (Wagerlogic) (Storming into the "Top 10" – this slot has everything. Really feels ‘fair’ too!

*Bejewelled (When I fancy a change.. I’ll never get bored of those three blue diamonds)

*Bullseye/Wheel Of Wealth/Spectacular (Simple three reeler with a good bonus that reminds me of my Las Vegas spiritual home)

Better yet, while we're doing a Top-10 list, I'd love to take it the other way. What are the Top-10 worst slot games you've played online.

Ah… This is tough. I can’t really name 10 bad ones – more just a couple and then some bad software providers (I’m talking from a visual perspective as opposed to payout/legitimacy).

Last time I tried AusVegas and Cherry – the slots did not look good. Sure they pay out the same, but I’m a very highly visual person – and they need to be pretty! On the same theme – what is going on with those STUPID RTG things? I think one of them is called “Shopping Spree” or something about Jazz Music… They’re awful. That one about winning a million quid as well where all the symbols pop up at the same time; that’s not a slot. Sort it out!!!

Wagerworks have got some dreadfully confusing ones too… Including that “Monkey Business” exact clone of the Vegas video slot. It’s rubbish in Vegas, it’s rubbish online!

As far as MG are concerned, the payoff from the bonus on “Moonshine” means I’ve pretty much walked away from it forever, and “Cashanova” is just a few lines and a few bonuses too far IMHO.

You're a 32red guy all the way. If you had to pick the next best casinos not named 32red, let's say the 5 next best casinos, which ones would they be? And of course, for what specified reasons?

*Roxy Palace – Let down a little bit with the no payback to UK cards, but good solid little outfit that just quietly do their job well. Best loyalty bonuses in the business too! Sadly I’ve had to let them go due to their insistence on not changing the ABSURD 24HR reverse withdrawal period!!!

*KIWI Casino – (Oooh bit of a left field entry here!) They just seem so nice and pleasant!!! A personal welcome from the casino host when you sign up, and what seems like a very slick professional outfit. Shame about 90% of the software ;)

*Spin Palace Group – Great casino liaison in the form of the ‘VIP Host’, and good customer retention. I had a small issue a while back, dealt with promptly and effectively. As close to feeling like a ‘UK outfit’ as you can get after 32RED if you like.

*Intercasino – Just effortless. Always pay, never an issue – and that software is catching MG FAST! I was a bit disappointed with a couple of Ryan’s replies on the forum – but for me they’ve been faultless.

*Blue Square – Not only for the FANTASTIC Cleopatra slot, but when you cashout – you get your money INSTANTLY!

Which casino have you gone to in the past, where you couldn't buy a win?

That new ‘Hype’ casino… Jeeeeeeeeez… I had some money kicking around in my Neteller account and thought I’d give it a go. Never seen my balance go south with such alarming speed!! Think I hit one feature on the "Treasure Hunter" one, which paid me 2x – Wahoo!!! Some serious bugs in that software too… At one point my balance displayed six figures – when it was actually about three. Nightmare!!

What are some of the most suspicious casinos (unaccredited) that you've plunked-some-loot with over the years?

See above, although I can’t really comment on the suspicious bit as I never got chance to try a cashout!!! Mainly kept clear of the worst and touch wood, have had no issues!

What sector of the universe would you call home?

Actually - England, UK (It’s exactly like depicted in ‘Tally Ho’, honest…)
Spiritually – The $1 Triple Wild Cherry slot, on the first corner before the elevators, The MGM Grand, Las Vegas.

Hmmm, I'm curious. What is your job?

The classic “bit of this, bit of that”… That sounds far more exciting than it actually is. Just essentially advising businesses on one thing and another and increasing profitability through a number of routes. I’m not a ‘consultant’ as such as I’m tied to a dedicated supplier, but it’s that sort of thing I guess. Sales/PR/Promoting stuff generally and making people use my stuff instead of other peoples!! I’m actually seriously considering entry into the UK online casino market at some level – so if anyone’s reading and wants to make an offer!??

Describe what you do on one of your "routine" trips to Vegas. Where do you generally like to stay? How many people do you go with? Where's the best place to eat?

I like to mix it up a bit!! I started off hitting The Bellagio’s and Venetian’s of this world, thinking that’s how you get to see the best of Vegas! Since I’ve done a load of the others including off strip, downtown, MGM Grand, Monte Carlo, New York New York… Bally’s I think is my favourite, and the one I end up back at most often… Besides – you get a ‘fountains’ view without paying the premium!!

In the past it’s generally just been me and the (very patient and understanding) Mrs Slotster who’s probably best to ask in terms of the best place to eat!!! So much choice… Probably my overall best dining experience was in the little French place inside the Monte Carlo… Completely forgotten the name off the top of my head but the food was out of this world.

What's a typical day in the life of "Slotster!"?

Get up, good strong coffee, check the markets to see if any shares have made me a millionaire, realize they’ve not – and go to work! Going to work is sometimes actually having to get ready and leave the house, or more often than not moving into the next room. Between about five and seven is kids playtime before little S is ushered off to bed, then it’s a DVD or maybe, sometimes, on the odd occasion – a few spins on Ladies Nite or something similar.

If you were to win a progressive, the lotto, or let's say connected 5 Wilds during a "FREE SPIN" session on Spring Break at $45 per spin (which is something I peg you to do first), what will you do? In other words, would you take some time off, retire, would you no longer have a reason to play Spring Break because you caught the dream? What would you do?

As you can no doubt imagine, I’ve lived this dream in my head many times over!! (In fact every time I press ‘start free spins’) I’d probably just carry on as normal… I enjoy the buzz of the slots when they hit big, so I can’t see a big win changing that – probably just up my stakes a bit more often… Unless it was "Millionaires Club" I suppose – in which case I’d be far too busy in Monte Carlo and Las Vegas to log on!

What are 5 websites that you go to everyday? And in which order would you rank them?

1) www.bbc.co.uk – Unbelievably brilliant site for news etc… Worth the license fee alone!

2) www.advfn.com – Investment / stocks shares etc

3) www.casinomeister.com – Some ropey online gambling site ;)

4) www.youtube.com – Generally someone sends me a link to something, and I end up losing the day browsing all sorts… Great great site.

5) www.32red.com - fire up that flash casino baby!

I see that you're a big fan of the Columbo series, as am I. I used to watch it as much as I could when they used to run the re-runs on "Sunday Morning Mysteries" on NBC, and every other hour on A&E over the past 15-odd years. It seems to me, each time I watch it, it feels as though Dick Van Dyke is ALWAYS playing the bad guy! Level with me, is this just a monster exaggeration on my part, or is he ALWAYS the bad guy (just as Jeffrey Tambor constantly appeared in "Three's Company" as some kind of loon character)? Geez, if he didn't do Mary Poppins, I'd think the guy was a real bastard.

Ha ha! “G’day Moiry Poppeens” – Worst Cockney Accent ever – FACT! I can only think of one episode off the top of my head that Van Dyke did – he’s certainly had some competition in the bad guy stakes!!! Patrick McGoohan popped up three or four times to bump people off, George Hamilton and the legendary William Shatner. In fact, keeping with the Star Trek connection – there was Leonard Nimoy too.

Old Attachment (Invalid)

Columbo is just fantastic. There always seems to be an episode on somewhere and, like you, I try to catch as much as I can! I recently bought the first two seasons on DVD, and easily sat through the lot over a couple of weekends. The formula is so simple, yet it never ever gets boring for me. Seriously, I cheer at every single “Just one more thing” moment, every single time.

Old Attachment (Invalid)

One of the great things for me is that they always managed to capture the feel of the moment, at the time the episode was made… The premise for each episode was often very pertinent to what was going on in the world at the time – right up to the 2001/2002 episode about the rave culture in LA! Moreover though, Peter Falk is just a legend… It was the little things that were running through as well! The car, the dog, the mysterious wife that helped to solve half the murders – but never appeared… Most of all of course – the mystery of his first name!!

Editors note: Huh? I could have sworn that Dick Van Dyke was in a bunch of Columbo episodes, but alas you are correct "Slotster!". He appeared as a photographer in the episode "Negative Reaction" (1974). I guess I keep seeing the same darn episode, so it SEEMS like he's in each episode. I guess "SEEMS" isn't enough to go by these days.

Side Note: While it's been mentioned here a couple of times over the past couple of months, while it's true that Mrs. Columbo never appeared in any episode of the Columbo series, she did in fact have her very own series not long after. The series was titled "Mrs. Columbo" (1979), starring Kate Mulgrew.

While I've seen a solid amount of Columbo episodes, I didn't see the episode where Columbo couldn't solve the case (I'd heard once upon a time that there was such an episode in the earlier years of the show). Do you know which episode I'm talking about?

Off the top of my head, I think that might be the one with the digital watches, where the supposed murdered Wife shows up again right near the end? Columbo gets the last laugh however when it turns out she’s ACTUALLY murdered her husband and buried him in the wall! Unless it’s another one! Ah, they’re all just great great great!

Is it just me, or are you a monster fan of "mobster" flicks?

Old Attachment (Invalid)

What’s it to you m*%6erf&**er?

Hell yes… There’s been so many fantastic one’s, and there’s just something so entertaining about vicariously living that glamorous and dangerous lifestyle. I never get tired of watching the "Godfather", plus "Casino" and "Goodfellas" are just such great, great films for so many reasons. I should mention at this point that anyone who has not yet discovered ‘The Soprano’s’ should do so, immediately. This is absolutely far and away the best thing to come out of your tele-box in a very very long time… Buy all five seasons on DVD, and prepare to lose the next week of your life. Looking forward to "The Departed" that’s just come out at the cinema.

Who would you rather take, Pacino and Coppola, or the team of DeNiro and Scorsese?

Argh… Can I not have "Pacoppola" and "ScorNiro"? That’s so hard… If I absolutely had to only live with one – it would clearly have to be Pacino and Coppola… A life without DeNiro and Scorsese would be very very grim indeed however.

I see you pretty much like an assortment of everything TV, music and film related. What would you consider to be the crappiest stuff you've ever come across (in all 3 genres)?

Reality TV has gone mad… The original "Big Brother" idea was a great one, but all the crappy talent shows and "Wife Swap" and the like that are about at the minute… Jeeeeeez… You can’t switch the telly on without seeing some ugly bint from Blackpool destroying a Whitney Houston song, or watching some dad from Leeds try to look after some other blokes kids with “hilarious” consequences. Reality TV has definitely hit meltdown… Besides, the air-time they take up – they could be showing Columbo repeats!

Old Attachment (Invalid)
One more time...​

There’s far too much bad about Music at the minute to talk about! It’s clichd (and I’m not even that old!) but 90% of stuff on the radio these days is just utter junk… That’s not to say there isn’t also GREAT new bands around, because there are – but the public at large still seem to lap up middle of the road garbage. James Blunt particularly is someone I’d like to beat to death with a spade every time I hear that stupid, painfully in-offensive whining voice. “BEAUTIFUL?? BEAUTIFUL!!??? YOU’RE NOT - F&****NG - BEAUTIFUL – NOW....”

And relax…

Films that annoy me are the usual, formulaic guaranteed ‘safe bets’ that Hollywood churn out… I just don’t see the point. Hold on, yes I do, to make money of course… “Hey look, I’m a slightly dipsy English man, and you’re a zany crazy American girl… We’re from DIFFERENT COUNTRIES – how hilarious…” and comedy ensues… There’s just endless light hearted junk it seems…

I understand that you're a 007 fan. And before I get to the question, I have a small story to run off (can interviewers do such a thing?). Back when I was living in Western Society, TBS used to run 21-days of Bond around late November/early December every year. And maybe they still do. I used all of my sick time - job shall remain nameless - just to watch them replay Bond movie after Bond movie. Funny thing is that I have the entire series on VHS cassettes, but it's not the same as watching it in real-time. Sick time WELL used! I don't regret a moment of it.

TOTALLY understand how it’s better to catch a film on the telly as opposed to DVD/VHS – Weird, huh?

What would you consider to be the 5 best Bond movies in the series? What are the 3 weakest of the series? If you were a producer/director/casting agent, who would you want as your next Bond?

Before I start… Daniel Craig? What the hell is that all about!??? I’ll give the guy a chance I guess but I fear the worst! Ok – Since I started this interview – I’ve watched it and it’s actually rather good. So well done DC!

Old Attachment (Invalid)
Too serious for those raised on the whimsical Moore era...

The worst one’s are easy – Timothy Dalton, who conveniently for this interview starred in two (Living Daylights and License to Kill) – and then probably in my opinion A View To A Kill. The fantastic Duran Duran theme not-withstanding, it was Roger Moore at the end, and just a little bit past the Bond role IMHO.

Best… Hmmm… In no particular order Goldeneye, From Russia With Love, The Spy Who Loved Me, On Her Majesty’s Secret Service and probably Goldfinger. I’ve not really done Pierce Brosnan justice there who was right on the cusp of topping Sean Connery before being unceremoniously dumped in favour of that new ugly blond chap!

Yes, that kind of story has really been recycled quite a bit over the past 10 years. While Hollywood does in fact "churns out" a high volume of predictable and often forgettable crap, what would you consider to be some of the most underrated flicks to have hit the screen over the past 30-or-so years?

I find it dead hard to pick “under-rated” films, because the great one’s that are tagged under-rated are often critically acclaimed and subsequently popular as a result… Um… Stuff I’ve been mega impressed with tends to universally be accepted as great. Ooh…”Swingers” and to a lesser extent “Made” (The second not least for an appearance by a certain Mr Falk) Swingers has got everything… Comedy, Drama and Vegas J Not a film – but FUTURAMA is definitely one of the most under-rated cartoon shows without a doubt. Never really made it in the shadow of The Simpsons, but every bit as fantastic.

What are some of your hobbies, non-online-casino-related ones?

Cars are my first and most enduring passion! Driving, cleaning, racing, talking about… They are beautiful and wonderful inventions that I could wax lyrical about all day long! I’m reasonably lucky to have enjoyed a few great cars in my time – and I’m always on the look out for the next one! Too many people buy cars that ‘get them from A to B’… If you’re going to spend all that money on a big lump of metal, make sure you look forward to getting into it every day, and get excited every time you’re behind the wheel!!! Playing music, although less than I’d like. The cinema as often as possible – and I suppose I should throw my family in here too.

Speaking about the enjoyment you've received from owning various cars... what cars have you owned and own?

Loads! Been through Japanese to German to British (yikes!)… Currently in something Shiny and German – saving up for something shiny and Italian.

Tell me the first thing that pops into your mind when I mention these names.

RobWin - Legend!! A real life Vegas screenshot to die for!!

Jetset - Calm, level, educated and informative – a gem!

Ed Ware - A living lesson to every other wannabe casino operator out there. Watch and learn, or watch 32Red take over the world!!!

Pete Doherty - Teach me your pulling techniques! Anyone who can look like that, and end up with a girl like that is saying or doing something right!!

Circus Circus - Wipe your feet on the way out.

The greatest Jim Henson puppet would have to be... - The Fraggles! All of them!

Jeff Gordon - Please ring Richard Hammond and give him some tips!

Michael Schumacher - German, Precise and annoyingly fantastic.

Chuck Norris - Hardest camp man ever!

Chuck Norris' tight jeans - My eyes! My eyes!! Someone erase that image from mind.

Chuck Norris vs. Bruce Lee (and yes, this sorta' did happen once) -Bruce Lee, every time. Can I not have Jackie Chan vs. Bruce Lee though instead!?

Pork chops - Yummy

London - Dirty, frustrating and fantastic

Michael Owens - Newspaper columns and A Question of Sport appearances here he comes…

The hottest Golden Girl would have to be... The flirty old minx. Not the one that looked like a transvestite or Rose (Rue McClanahan)

Fawlty Towers - You invaded Poland!

WinnersOnline - Heard it mentioned a lot, don’t know what it is! Is that the forum one? Think I’ve taken a cursory glance!

Harvey Keitel - "Pretty please with a cherry on top – now clean the fucking car."

Britpop - The world woke up five years after its best!

Armor All - Zymol!!

Bryan Bailey - Cool, collected and one of the few genuine reasons why the interweb is so fantastic.

Greatest "Bond" lady - Ursula Andress

Jude Law - Did ‘Alfie’ real justice

Lotus Elan - Dated frighteningly, would still own one, in white.

7-11 - Lifesaver for anyone who regularly does the California/Las Vegas drive!

And I'm going to finish off with a monster question. A new twist. Two teams, tell me who comes out on top in 5-different categories.

Team Alpha-Slotster!
Team Beta-SlotsJunkie

- Slotster
- SlotsJunkie

- Simmo!
- Jetset

- Spearmaster

- Pinababy69
- Slotchik

- Professor
- GrandMaster

- silcnlayc
- suzecat

- dominique
- mary

- liquidsoap
- cheekymonkey

- RobWin
- Gramma

- Vesuvio
- Caruso

- Waylander
- Trezz

- Cipher
- KasinoKing

- Path
- Ryan Hartley

- Mousey
- Silkprint

- vinylweatherman
- Zoozie

- tennis_balls
- happygobrokey

- Zodiac
- Sodax77

- Lord_Have-Mercy
- thelawnet

- polli123
- aka23

- chuchu59
- Macgyver

- frufrugirl
- mattysgirl

- bpb
- soflat

- MrVan
- andyhinckley

- hbears341
- kwblue

- WinBig
- gfkostas

- paul02085
- paul1

- Bruce Hamilton
- RudePete

- venetian
- vickie40

- managra
- Cynthia777

- DarthVader
- Vortran

I've tried to match these teams as best as I could. In the end who wins?

"The Catwalk Challenge"​

Modeling the latest looks from the hottest designers, team Alpha and Beta take to the catwalk….

Team ALPHA scream ahead with the model good looks of Slotster and Pinababy bringing the house down – and Spearmaster working the audience. Meanwhile, Casinomeister commits the worst of fashion faux pas’ with a cheeky little gingham and black satin number (what WAS he thinking!??) – whilst KasinoKing falls off the edge trying to reach a penny on the floor.


"Rubiks Cube"​

Vortran completes all sides, dismantles it, puts it back together, mixes it up and completes it again before Simmo! From team Alpha gets it out of the box. “It’s got pretty colours” comments Cheeky Monkey before picking up the prize for Team Beta.


"Ready Steady COOK!"​

Team Alpha score an early lead, as Grandmaster whips up a delightful salmon mousse. Followed by Vesuvios’s profiterole ‘surprise’. Sadly it turns out that the surprise is Vinylweathermans Volkswagen used oil change was the ‘sauce’. Despite Andy Hinckleys poor attempt at “Ham Sandwich” – Team beta win by default.


Zoozie goes all weird talking about probability and fractions and then quantum theory and stuff. RobWin declares “Anyone fancy a pint?”, before everyone nonchalantly edges backwards and out into the pub. Zoozie was last seen frantically running around shouting “HAS ANYONE GOT ANY MORE CHALK!!?!?!? I NEED MORE CHALK!!?!? Just one more hundredth of a point and I’ve cracked it!!!!


"The Progressive Challenge!!!"

Inspired by Slotjunkies, the ALPHA VERSUS BETA progressive challenge gets underway. With immense speculation and media coverage, all team members fire up their casino of choice at precisely the same time. The balances are funded, the fingers poised over the bet max button…. Anticipation lingers in the air, you can cut the atmosphere with a knife… and then, as if everyone has waited forever – the flag falls and GO!!!!

Gramma hits the jackpot on his first spin. Game over.


Soooooo Team BETA WIN!!!

Hold on – which team was I on again? :confused: Damn.

Final question

You've recently mentioned that you're going to be low-rolling it in '07". Explain why the drastic change? Also, do you think that resolution will stick? You are after all the most famous of the high-rollers.

Ha! Erm… Well it’s stuck up to now!!!! I just looked at a few statements and cashcheck screens and stuff and thought “Wow!” Because I enjoy casually spinning those slots when I get some free time, I just totally didn’t realize how much I was sometimes piling in! What I’ve been doing this year up to now is depositing less, and playing at lower denominations to string out my playing time… I still get the same amount of enjoyment (well ok, maybe a little bit less when that five symbol with wild kicker gives you two hundred quid!!), but there’s less coming out of the bank and into the casino…

Maybe I’ll get bored and be back to my higher stakes play in no time… Who knows? ;)


In closing,

I'd like to thank "Slotster" for his patience, commitment, and for keeping it fun.

Thank you all for your time. :)


A cracking read :D The only downside being he's gonna bore me solid talking about lumps of metal that get you from A to B on Wednesday evening :( ;)

Slotster said:
Sadly Ive had to let them go due to their insistence on not changing the ABSURD 24HR reverse withdrawal period!!!

48 ;)

Meanwhile, Casinomeister commits the worst of fashion faux pas with a cheeky little gingham and black satin number (what WAS he thinking!??) whilst KasinoKing falls off the edge trying to reach a penny on the floor.

Steed......you are such a smartazz! :D

Caruso on the same team as Suzecat???????? :eek: What? You want the collective computers to simultaneously meltdown and blow up? :what:
Nice one Mr. Steed. :thumbsup:

Slotster! - low rolling!?! Yeah right! :p

It's only a matter of time before we all witness a Slotster special screenshot with 5 wilds on LN at 27 a spin, then upping the stake to 125 a spin on Loaded and hitting 5 Mr 777's in a x4 free spins round - LOL!

Errmm...actually, I think I am getting a bit carried away here! :eek2:

Wicked post! Yeahhhh....
Once again - a post which is far too long to even begin to read! :eek2:
(Well, I've got work (gambling) to do! :cool: )

Tell you what, I'm going to print it out to give me something to read on the train to ICE on Wednesday, when (if all goes according to plan) I'll meet the Mighty SlotMeister in person! :notworthy
Sacre Bleu!

Ha! Cheers Mr Steed - Beautifully presented as ever!!

Thank you especially for the James Blunt picture - that's always nice... Grrrrr...

Simmo - I promise not to bore you too much, honest. Cheeky - Not only am I still low rollin' - I've not actually played online in over a week!! :eek: KK - Make sure you don't fall asleep on the train and miss your stop!

I feel all laid bare and naked! :eek2: :D
"whilst KasinoKing falls off the edge trying to reach a penny on the floor."

:lolup: My God! That was soooo funny! Great entertainment! Very well written by both sides.

PS: I'm mad cuz I didn't get to be on one of the teams! You should see me stroll the Catwalk in drag!


PS: I'm mad cuz I didn't get to be on one of the teams! You should see me stroll the Catwalk in drag!

Sorry Tim, at that point, you'd been away from the forum for quite some time. "Slotster" and I had been working on this for quite some time now, so some of these questions are going back a while. It's great having you back though! :)



Thank you especially for the James Blunt picture - that's always nice... Grrrrr...

There's a reason it took so long to post this sucker. :D I wanted to get the perfect picture to make this piece complete. James Blunt is sort of like Chris Martin without Coldplay. I'm not sure if he's a ripoff (only time will tell), but at least to me, I see a lot of similarities in the two of them (although I really like Chris Martin... and Coldplay may be overrated, but they're GOOD overrated which is nice).

I think Blunt is to Martin, what Skeet Ulrich is to Johnny Depp.



Steed......you are such a smartazz! :D

Hmmm, perhaps if I could have made it 3 teams. One for all of those who've been banned on team "X". To qualify, all you needed to do was to have been banned just once. Didn't the legendary "spearmaster" ban himself at one point? :D



Once again - a post which is far too long to even begin to read! :eek2:


too long thread to be read for me:oops:

I'll admit that when I read this stuff, it initially pisses-me-off. :cool: But in fairness, they've got a point. My posts have traditionally been very long, and for some, they want to read something quickly. I guess reading content on their computer (something of greater length) is not the same as reading in the comfort of their own recliner, sofa, or bed. I can also relate to that. However, if these Q & A's are long, it's because I really enjoy going through a series of questions.

I'll probably never meet the majority of the forum members, and I am curious about who these people are. Asking 5 questions is not really going to satisfy me. I'm not saying these posts capture everything about the person behind the handle (people are generally too private for that, as I would be as well), but we can at least get a bit of a read, and that's good enough for me. I'm not going to compromise my style, because I write for me. :)


I thought it was awesome johnsteed!! Brilliant work as usual....and it's not like you post like this every day....but when it's like this...it's a treat every few months or so :):thumbsup: :notworthy
RobWin declares Anyone fancy a pint?, before everyone nonchalantly edges backwards and out into the pub.

Set um all up Woody, free drinks for all ! :D :D

Great post Johnsteed, got to learn a bit more about my buddy Slotster

Slotster....my wife tells me too that she thinks that I am a legend " in my OWN mind " :cool:
Brillant and funny reading , what a crazy imagination you have dear Steed.

Can someone remind of RobWin RL vegas screenshot?

(Note to self: I gotta work with my image - what a bore!)


Many thanks people! :)


Brilliant and funny reading , what a crazy imagination you have dear Steed.

The brainchild behind the 5-part "Challenge" questions was "Slotster!". I just gave him a ball-of-clay, and he went off into his very own world and molded it into what it is. :notworthy He really did a masterful job at answering and working with whatever material I threw at him!


and he went off into his very own world and molded it into what it is.

A scary, scary place... Trust me!

Hey Steed - I just noticed! Where's my exclamation mark!!??

I dunno, half hearted job as usual... Heh hee... :D

Zoozie - we wouldn't have you any other way! :thumbsup: Robwin's Vegas win is somewhere way back at the beginning of the Winner Screenshots thread... An absolute BEAUTY!! :notworthy
Very nice stuff Mr Steed!

Slotster, you're a real gambler and I like it :thumbsup: Here's a humble tribute to you :notworthy

It's a genuine Hoffman underneath so who knows, it might become valuable in the future...

Very nice stuff Mr Steed!

Slotster, you're a real gambler and I like it :thumbsup: Here's a humble tribute to you :notworthy

It's a genuine Hoffman underneath so who knows, it might become valuable in the future...


:lolup: :lolup:

Fantastic! Cheers!

Damn that last Fonzy though... I wonder if it would go "Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!" When it drops in? :D Brilliant!


It's copyrighted. Use it and I'll sue :p


Hey Steed - I just noticed! Where's my exclamation mark!!??

Sorry, won't happen again... :D You'll still have to deal with "philipfromparis" for using the "Fonze" if he ever comes back to make a cameo.


Last edited:
johnsteed; said:
I'll admit that when I read this stuff, it initially pisses-me-off. :cool: But in fairness, they've got a point. My posts have traditionally been very long, and for some, they want to read something quickly. I guess reading content on their computer (something of greater length) is not the same as reading in the comfort of their own recliner, sofa, or bed. I can also relate to that. However, if these Q & A's are long, it's because I really enjoy going through a series of questions.
Looking back now, I realised my comment about John's posts could be seen as a criticism of his great work!

This was not my intention, I assure you!
I am always in a state of frustration that I don't have time to do everything I'd like to - including reading!
JohnSteed's posts are the results of many hours (days?.. weeks..?) of blood, sweat & tears, and should be consumed slowly, enjoyed, savored - like a fine red wine, a Havana cigar, or a kings banquet - not just gobbled down like a quick pie & pint grabbed at half time in a footy match! :eek:

What I meant was that I felt I didn't have the time to read it properly when I posted. I have now printed it out & am really looking forward to reading it in all it's glory on the train to ICE tomorrow!

So sorry if any offense caused Mr.Steed - keep up the sterling work! :thumbsup:

I'm not going to compromise my style, because I write for me. :)
You damn well better not compromise young man - or I'm gonna fly out there and give you a damn good spanking! :D

Looking forward to your next masterpiece already! ;)

Users who are viewing this thread

Meister Ratings