Time to say Goodbye

[tempestcayla]

Hi All, I joined Casinomeister less than three months ago and now its time to say goodbye, though I have truly enjoyed the site and the people. I started playing slots online a little over three months ago. At the very beginning it was a form of therapeutic stress relief... "me time" a little escape from my 12 hours shift medical profession I told myself and then I started to use gambling online for a little "me time" and enjoyment a break from the worry for my husband and his prostate cancer battle/surgery.

Over the last three months I managed to deposit and lose over 1500$ at my favorite site (not to mention hundreds in free chips.) "Poof," nothing to show for it, after one small withdrawal at the beginning I lost and chased and lost some more. I made excuses to myself that it wasnt that bad because I was only making 20-40$ deposits. Except when I played I would make two or three deposits in a night. I could feel that I was slipping on a slope and somewhere along the road I lost my way.

Today January 2nd, I decided the gist is completely up. My husband now knows fully of my deposits and his disappointment in the choices I made is obvious. With my losses I can no longer pretend that this was just a form of entertainment. $1500 was a lot of money any way you label it. I officially closed my account tonight at my favorite place. I won't be back, I will be refocusing on my life and my husband.

Please do not think that I am in any way blaming anyone but myself for my gambling. I was selfish.
In the end I just wanted to share this news in case there was anyone else out there in the same spot. Reading other posts in this part of the forum helped me find the strength to finally say "Enough". Thank you CasinoMeister for including this area on your site.

 

[chayton]

I just wanted to wish continued good health to your husband and good luck to you both in your life together. I'm proud of you for knowing what your limit is and when to walk away - some people don't get that.

 

[rainmaker]

.

I am sorry to hear about your bad experience with online gaming. But it is great to see that you have decided to quit at this time. All the best to you

 

[pevangel]

God Bless you on all you do in life, you are very wise to do this, when it is not fun anymore it is surely time to quit. I admire you for this and totally respect your decision.


pevangel

 

[taysh075]

I wish you the best. It's a good thing that you recognised that for you this could be a big problem so early. Many take years and huge losses, putting themselves in serious debt. So good for you Tempestcayla and good luck in the rest of your life. I hope you find something else to give you that all important 'me time' that is a little less damaging for you.

 

[jetset]

Kudos for being smart enough to recognise a problem before it can develop any further, and for having the courage and good sense to take remedial action.

All the best to you and your husband in his fight against cancer.

 

[P.V.]

You should include yourself to our online self exclusion list as you're clearly level headed and understand when it's time to quit.

Let me know if you'd like to be blocked from doing this again, I'll get you added.

Good for you..

 

[BingoT]

I wish you the very best & God Bless you on all you do in life.
~T~

 

[Simmo!]

Kudos for being smart enough to recognise a problem before it can develop any further, and for having the courage and good sense to take remedial action.

All the best to you and your husband in his fight against cancer.

Ditto that. Good luck

 

[rockycatt]

WHAT ALL THE OTHERS ALREADY SAID , and prayers for your husband's recovery

 

[LHofsdal]

Best wishes to you and your husband, hopefully he will recover quickly. A big WTG!!! to you for knowing your limits and stopping.


Lori

 

[cpdnd31]

Hey no one said it yet, let me be the first I'm proud of you!!!!!!! I hope you hubby a speedy recovery hun.

CHOCMARTINI

 

[Casinomeister]

Wishing you all the best. I'm placing you in the Quit Gambling user group that allows you to still interact in the non-gambling forums (if you choose so). If you want the account to be 100% closed up, just PM me and let me know.

Hope all goes well.

Sincerely,

Bryan

 

[samoas]

Best wishes tempestcayla. I admire your determination and may you be blessed with luck in other aspects of life.

 

[tempestcayla]

Hi ALL! One month later a reflection.

Just wanted to let everyone know that I am doing great. Feel much better and now that I have taken the step back and
reanalyzed my playing. At first it was hard but I kept coming back and reading all the positive responses. Also talking with the dear husband has helped realize that there were more constructive ways to handle my stress and fears. He is doing wonderful and we are taking things one day at a time.
He even said that if I want to play a little again he would be my warning system or reminder or limiter of time and money.
Not sure if I will ever go back to online gambling but we shall see, I am definitely in no hurry.
Thank you all for your warm wishes. I appreciate each and every one of you.

 

[Nate]

Just wanted to let everyone know that I am doing great. Feel much better and now that I have taken the step back and
reanalyzed my playing. At first it was hard but I kept coming back and reading all the positive responses. Also talking with the dear husband has helped realize that there were more constructive ways to handle my stress and fears. He is doing wonderful and we are taking things one day at a time.
He even said that if I want to play a little again he would be my warning system or reminder or limiter of time and money.
Not sure if I will ever go back to online gambling but we shall see, I am definitely in no hurry.
Thank you all for your warm wishes. I appreciate each and every one of you.

Great to hear you are coping well.

Don't be in any kind of hurry. If you can refrain completely from playing it will be better for your pocket. Ask any experienced gambler here, irrelevant of the rush it brings us, it ultimately burns a hole in your wallet ...

Nate

 

[LHofsdal]

Just wanted to let everyone know that I am doing great. Feel much better and now that I have taken the step back and
reanalyzed my playing. At first it was hard but I kept coming back and reading all the positive responses. Also talking with the dear husband has helped realize that there were more constructive ways to handle my stress and fears. He is doing wonderful and we are taking things one day at a time.
He even said that if I want to play a little again he would be my warning system or reminder or limiter of time and money.
Not sure if I will ever go back to online gambling but we shall see, I am definitely in no hurry.
Thank you all for your warm wishes. I appreciate each and every one of you.

Glad to hear things are going well for you and the hubby. I also wanted to say thanks for coming back and giving us an update.

Take what Nate said, don't be in a hurry to come back. You have learned more constructive ways to handle your stress and fears, use them. Trust me when I say your not missing a damn thing not gaming online anymore. The difference in the "tone" of your first post to this last post is like night and day. You seem so much more positive and stressless, don't let the online gaming bring you back to the downside like your first post!

Wishing you and the hubby all the best, and hope he recovers quickly. Enjoy the time together and cherish it, because if you do that, you have already hit the biggest jackpot you will ever hit!

LH

 

[tempestcayla]

Thanks again, and everyone is correct and like my op,
I am in nooo hurry to return to online gambling. If if I ever
do, it won't be for stress relief or as an escape from dealing with what life is
throwing. It would be for fun.
I will continue to check in here incase I can lend an ear or spread encouragement
to someone else.

 

[Jasminebed]

Sorry I didn't respond first time through. I'm glad it's going well for you.

I've been gambling all of my adult life (and somewhat before it), so over 35 years. The times I had the most problems with it were always the times I had the most problems in my life, seeking that escape.

Honestly, if I was in the US and faced the same nightmares depositing and withdrawing as my US friends, I think I'd still be on the bus once a week instead!

Part of the thrill of gambling IS increased stress. And that stress can eclipse other stresses, at least temporarily.

It's good that your hubby knows, but he may not realize the pull it has if he suggests you might enjoy it occasionally. But having someone else involved helps you set limits too. If he's not well, and you really can't get out, $50 worth of low rolling on a weekend with both of you behind the computer can be fun, and less than dinner than a movie. But we don't want to make two monsters where there was only one before.

I know every day I am an at-risk gambler, and I use tools like a prepaid card I must go out and load, or an ewallet that's funded through withdrawals to limit what I play. I can't just pile them one on top of another because the night is not going well and I am still looking for that escape.

There's where time posting at CM comes in handy, lol.

I became involved in online gambling during a period of illness, it's a great alternative to those who have difficulty going to a landbased one. You could buy a new video game monthly and still have something to occupy you for a couple of deposits a month. But at the same time, you won't ever cash out from that video game.

Everyone has a budget, and gambling needs to be part of your entertainment budget if you gamble. And like most items in your budget, you have to make choices. I do without take-out food and going to bars to fund mine.

 

[tempestcayla]

Though, I have been given the
go ahead to play, I just think its
lost its appeal. Price for me is just too
high now.

 

[BustedFlush]

Hope the recovery of your husband continues. God Bless. You are starting your abstinence from a very good starting point. There are thousands who wish they'd made their decision at your stage, 1500 dollars down before it got worse. it's like alcohol - once you decide it's a problem you cannot drink at all, it's either alcoholism or abstinence,

You are strong, you are in control. Your husband probably has the psychology that because you care for him he won't begrudge you a little relief on the slots, a kind of trade off. Underneath though, he will almost certainly (going by his first reaction) hope you don't feel the need to play. And you haven't thus far. Win-win.
All the best.