- Joined
- Aug 26, 2010
- Location
- Old bag lady with a laptop
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Latex Factory
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A guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products. At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud "hiss-pop" noise. "The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold," explains the guide. "The popping sound is the needle poking a hole in the end of the nipple."
Later, the tour reaches the part of the factory where condoms are manufactured. The machine makes a "Hiss. Hiss. Hiss" noise. but every so often there is a "Pop!" noise.
"Wait a minute!" says the man taking the tour. "I understand what the 'hiss, hiss,' is, but what's that 'pop' every so often?"
"Oh, it's just the same as in the baby-bottle nipple machine," says the guide. "It pokes a hole in every tenth condom."
"Well, that can't be good for the condoms!"
"Yeah, but it's great for the baby-bottle nipple business!"
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Doctors' Child
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An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about her then-four-year-old daughter.
On the way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it.
Be still, my heart, thought my friend, gee, my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps and be a doctor!
Then the child spoke into the instrument: "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order?"
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Informational fact?
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Research has found that if you are afraid of spiders, you are more likely to find one in your bedroom.
I am really, really afraid of Tom Selleck...now I am going to sleep.
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Sarcastic Quote
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"Why can't we be friends? Well, because you're three gallons of crazy in a two gallon bucket and I don't have time for a mess like you."
Latex Factory
-------------------------
A guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products. At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud "hiss-pop" noise. "The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold," explains the guide. "The popping sound is the needle poking a hole in the end of the nipple."
Later, the tour reaches the part of the factory where condoms are manufactured. The machine makes a "Hiss. Hiss. Hiss" noise. but every so often there is a "Pop!" noise.
"Wait a minute!" says the man taking the tour. "I understand what the 'hiss, hiss,' is, but what's that 'pop' every so often?"
"Oh, it's just the same as in the baby-bottle nipple machine," says the guide. "It pokes a hole in every tenth condom."
"Well, that can't be good for the condoms!"
"Yeah, but it's great for the baby-bottle nipple business!"
-----------------------------------------------------------
Doctors' Child
-------------------
An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about her then-four-year-old daughter.
On the way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it.
Be still, my heart, thought my friend, gee, my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps and be a doctor!
Then the child spoke into the instrument: "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order?"
-----------------------------------------
Informational fact?
--------------------------
Research has found that if you are afraid of spiders, you are more likely to find one in your bedroom.
I am really, really afraid of Tom Selleck...now I am going to sleep.
---------------------------------------------------
Sarcastic Quote
------------------
"Why can't we be friends? Well, because you're three gallons of crazy in a two gallon bucket and I don't have time for a mess like you."
