dieptepunt
Registered
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2021
- Location
- amsterdam
Hello all,
First of all, I understand that this is not just any forum post and may also violate the forum's rules, which I am sorry, but that is not my main concern at the moment. I have been a member of Casinomeister for over ten years, but I still chose to do this on a new account. For 15 years I have been struggling with myself and my addictions. 15 years of personal and financial trial and error. I have already been treated several times, have already had 2 intakes at different agencies this year and have been told twice that they actually can't help me. In summary, I fall into several 'boxes' at the same time, namely: addictions, depression and suicidality. bit completely lost.
This post stems from sheer desperation, but the alternative if I wouldn't is a boundary that, like this post, I don't want to cross, but will cross if necessary. I have been a danger to myself for years, a great concern for family and friends and almost certainly convinced that it would be the best for me and the people who worry about me when I am gone. Because that is also the morbid thing for me when I am gambling and I myself had access to my salary and I blew it through in 1 evening / night, I can always put an end to it. As a result, I now go through life as a kamikaze pilot. That way of thinking is already baked into my system, but I am still alive, but all the stretch that was about in me has gone. No more work (benefit), problematic debts, and since this year in administration, which I really do not want and makes deeply unhappy, but this was the only option was to be able to solve a few things financially in the future. I have a living money bank account with which I can only receive money from the administration and cannot make online transactions.
Let me say that I have hit the biggest low point in my life yet.
I didn't intend to make it such a long story, but now come to what I wanted to give at least a chance. Because I have so much frustration and anger in me, I have reached the point where it has been in my head for a number of days that I have to commit robbery. Of course a border that I do not want to cross, but I am so far gone. I also only need $ 60, but that's so important to me now for a number of things (not to gamble, I'll just add it) that I am willing to do extreme things for it.
If I had had other options than the call in this post, I would have tried them first, but there are none.
<snipped content>
I don't want to say that I find it a hopeless message myself, at least I have tried it. There will still be quite a few people, with a good or bad heart, who can help a stranger in an emergency situation (that's what it is for me). I used google translate to translate this piece of text, that will probably give some grammatical errors.
I understand that there will be reactions to this that do not directly relate to my question, positive or negative, but I will not go into that at first.
First of all, I understand that this is not just any forum post and may also violate the forum's rules, which I am sorry, but that is not my main concern at the moment. I have been a member of Casinomeister for over ten years, but I still chose to do this on a new account. For 15 years I have been struggling with myself and my addictions. 15 years of personal and financial trial and error. I have already been treated several times, have already had 2 intakes at different agencies this year and have been told twice that they actually can't help me. In summary, I fall into several 'boxes' at the same time, namely: addictions, depression and suicidality. bit completely lost.
This post stems from sheer desperation, but the alternative if I wouldn't is a boundary that, like this post, I don't want to cross, but will cross if necessary. I have been a danger to myself for years, a great concern for family and friends and almost certainly convinced that it would be the best for me and the people who worry about me when I am gone. Because that is also the morbid thing for me when I am gambling and I myself had access to my salary and I blew it through in 1 evening / night, I can always put an end to it. As a result, I now go through life as a kamikaze pilot. That way of thinking is already baked into my system, but I am still alive, but all the stretch that was about in me has gone. No more work (benefit), problematic debts, and since this year in administration, which I really do not want and makes deeply unhappy, but this was the only option was to be able to solve a few things financially in the future. I have a living money bank account with which I can only receive money from the administration and cannot make online transactions.
Let me say that I have hit the biggest low point in my life yet.
I didn't intend to make it such a long story, but now come to what I wanted to give at least a chance. Because I have so much frustration and anger in me, I have reached the point where it has been in my head for a number of days that I have to commit robbery. Of course a border that I do not want to cross, but I am so far gone. I also only need $ 60, but that's so important to me now for a number of things (not to gamble, I'll just add it) that I am willing to do extreme things for it.
If I had had other options than the call in this post, I would have tried them first, but there are none.
<snipped content>
I don't want to say that I find it a hopeless message myself, at least I have tried it. There will still be quite a few people, with a good or bad heart, who can help a stranger in an emergency situation (that's what it is for me). I used google translate to translate this piece of text, that will probably give some grammatical errors.
I understand that there will be reactions to this that do not directly relate to my question, positive or negative, but I will not go into that at first.
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