Thinking of going all in?

A loss like that is devastating.
But if nothing else, a learning moment, as trite as that may seem.
There's much in life to live for even if you can't see it today.

Find a new hobby to dive into and attack it with zeal. Spend all that energy into something postitive and it might surprise you what you'll walk away with.
 
Find a new hobby to dive into and attack it with zeal. Spend all that energy into something postitive and it might surprise you what you'll walk away with.
I wish I had energy.
It's sapped. Every day I wake up praying for death, literally thinking about ways to kill myself from morning to night and then the kids run in at 5am through 9pm and I have to pretend to be happy about it because I know I'm only miserable because my dad wasn't able to fake it as well. I have hobbies but I have no time for them because the wife needs to go work and these days we need to support that. So I go through my day hating every moment and sacrificing and paying for everything and get no thanks but rather scorn for not enjoying my lot in life.
 
I wish I had energy.
It's sapped. Every day I wake up praying for death, literally thinking about ways to kill myself from morning to night and then the kids run in at 5am through 9pm and I have to pretend to be happy about it because I know I'm only miserable because my dad wasn't able to fake it as well. I have hobbies but I have no time for them because the wife needs to go work and these days we need to support that. So I go through my day hating every moment and sacrificing and paying for everything and get no thanks but rather scorn for not enjoying my lot in life.

My advice would be to go and have a chat with your doctor - let him/her know how you're feeling - they will be able to get the support you need. You've done the hard bit in admitting you have an issue, so please seek some assistance. Trust me, I've been where you are mentally and there is help out there if you're happy to accept it. Don't try and manage this on your own.
 
My advice would be to go and have a chat with your doctor - let him/her know how you're feeling - they will be able to get the support you need. You've done the hard bit in admitting you have an issue, so please seek some assistance. Trust me, I've been where you are mentally and there is help out there if you're happy to accept it. Don't try and manage this on your own.
Glad you found a good doctor. The dozen or so shrinks I've seen haven't been able to do shit.
I just lost the last of my savings.
I'm going to take the last $3k in my card and just drive, dunno where.
Adios
 
That seemed like too much trouble so I just took a scalpel to my wrist instead.
Turns out going deep enough really hurts. Took about six attempts.
Kids woke up and wife found me soaked in blood. Nothing arterial. bandaged up now.
Still have $3k left so all hope is not lost. Don't think I can win it back anymore.
 
Someone call the police or at least a professional. This is beyond. You need help, sir. @Casinomeister

You could have saved yourself from all this, if you acted upon the first day you created this thread, by cutting the access to your funds. You obviously are no longer in control of your gambling and you need a time-out. A serious time-out. One led by a professional. Your a harm to your family right now as it can be traumatising to your own kids.

@neon claws - i really hope the best for you but for now it's best you seek immediate help. Quit lurking on this forum, call someone, call a professional, be taken for a few days out to get your mind straight. Do whatever it takes, but stop this frigging train your on.
 
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Crap, if your on a mission to wreck yourself, at least try to keep your wife and / or kids out of this. They dont have to grow up with a traumatized experience of dad going through hell back and forth. If you for fuck sake please seek help for your ongoing problem, ill and lots of others promise you to make work out of these fake streamers imposing a reckless and financial zero loss gambling on the internet.

I hate 'm just as you hate them for imposing something very unlikely. And personally those who gain or pray on other weaks among us shall be burned to the end of the internet in my opinion. Whatever it is your going through, just remember the sun will be shining another day and there's always a sollution for whatever your battling. Just stay of the drink(s) or other funky shit that influences your mind right now.
 
Take a step back and realise money is just a number. If you can pay your bills for next month its ok. You have your kids and wife, that's what matters. Block yourself from all gambling. Deep breaths and you can overcome this!
 
That seemed like too much trouble so I just took a scalpel to my wrist instead.
Turns out going deep enough really hurts. Took about six attempts.
Kids woke up and wife found me soaked in blood. Nothing arterial. bandaged up now.
Still have $3k left so all hope is not lost. Don't think I can win it back anymore.
Honestly mate please go an get help. I had a swingy gambling session today and took stock of what i have. It might be hard with the Mrs working and having kids, but don't forget that while you are feeling down about your reality, what you have is a dream for some people. I know a lot of people who would love to have the Mrs/2 kids lifestyle - you are a lot better off than you think you are.

Whatever you decide to do, please do not put your self in a position where the kids find you covered in blood (or worse) as that will seriously affect them growing up. I hope you get the help you need.
 
That seemed like too much trouble so I just took a scalpel to my wrist instead.
Turns out going deep enough really hurts. Took about six attempts.
Kids woke up and wife found me soaked in blood. Nothing arterial. bandaged up now.
Still have $3k left so all hope is not lost. Don't think I can win it back anymore.
I hope you're not winding us up. If you are truly bandaged up, and your wife is there - please either you or your wife, or both call 131114 NOW!

Stop posting and get help please.
 
I wish I had energy.
It's sapped. Every day I wake up praying for death, literally thinking about ways to kill myself from morning to night and then the kids run in at 5am through 9pm and I have to pretend to be happy about it because I know I'm only miserable because my dad wasn't able to fake it as well. I have hobbies but I have no time for them because the wife needs to go work and these days we need to support that. So I go through my day hating every moment and sacrificing and paying for everything and get no thanks but rather scorn for not enjoying my lot in life.

Taking what you posted in this thread as all true, just think about it for a minute. You had 200k in Ethereum. 200k.

Now, while mental heath issues are serious, they can be sorted out with the right medication and/or therapy. You clearly have a lot of savvy to have built up that much money in crypto, so why not get the help you need then set about rebuilding that money again? That will keep your mind occupied. Except this time put the controls in place to prevent you going on another blowout. Discover the joy of low-rolling and trying to turn $100 into $500. Bigger stakes just lead to mega stress. Get that help.
 
A gambling addiction is a "true" disease. Just like a heroin or alcohol addict, the need for that fix will always be there. The thing is you either fully quit, and live without it as much as you can, or you accept it that your a (compulsive) gambler, and you know your limits.

Your not going to quit while, still active on forums, watching winning video's, or searching for gambling related shit other then how to discipline more on resisting gambling. I think the industry takes a far too easy of a approach really as a gambling addiction is a true developing disease really.

Copy some personality disorders with that, alcohol abuse and you got the perfect recepy for disaster waiting to happen. Frankly a relation of me that paid me for my services halfway 'cancelled' it and started to speak about having 90k of debts, was fired from his job and coud'nt proceed with the project anymore. He did'nt wanted to tell on how exactly he got the 90k debt in barely a year, but i'm pretty close to know it is a gambling addiction. I just feel it in his presence really.

Dude; think of your family for a second; and stop going down onto that 100% destruction. There's quit some people in this world who would like to have or want, what you have. And your blowing it for what, playing games that trigger compulsive gambling? F that.
 
Shieet.. Feel sorry for your loses.. But why make this trauma to your family. To your child… because of money? I have aldo lost almost evrything i saved but i would never do this to kids. I feel sorry for hem.. seek help Mate
 
Look, man
In this covid period......I've lost my job and friends (my choice) and nearly all my pets and family (rainbow bridge) and while life isn't a competition, I can tell you..I've seen the bottom of the well.
But...I've seen things MAKE me scale back up and FOUND reasons to make life work for me, not make me work for life.
For me? got a dog. It depends on me for it's well-being
for you? You've children. Strive every day to make their lives better than the one dealt to you.
WORK for it......in your actions. Want to pack it in? Think of how you can help/make so, so many more people NOT go through what you have.
Need a mission? Think outward if you arent any longer able to look in.
 
Yeah I'm trying to make appointments but can't even get through to doctor's at the moment, COVID I guess, been trying since the offices opened and they just disconnect immediately. Looking at trying electroshock since I've tried every other med.
I'm not usually the type to request a user be banned or publicly shamed but this type of cowardly pm I was sent is pretty gross (attached).
 

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Very well written. Best advice is for everyone to have their own mission sorted out. If it's not for you which i can understand, it should be for your kids and their wellbeing.

Trauma's are something people can walk with the rest of their life's.
 
Yeah I'm trying to make appointments but can't even get through to doctor's at the moment, COVID I guess, been trying since the offices opened and they just disconnect immediately. Looking at trying electroshock since I've tried every other med.
I'm not usually the type to request a user be banned or publicly shamed but this type of cowardly pm I was sent is pretty gross (attached).
What the hell is wrong with people? Gottoslot has been banned permanently from the forum.
 

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