Don't like either candidate? Here's a perfect write-in.

[winbig]

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As soon as I read about how they were going to run the Government, I just knew that I'd have to vote for them.

What do we need with a platform? Our political stance is simple and straight-forward. In fact, you can say with some certainty that if you don't see your favorite gripe here, we hamsters are even more against whatever-it-is than you are.

Upon our election, we will basically run on our little hamster wheels (and not on some phoney platform) while you govern yourselves. In other words, we trust you.

Q&A:

ISSUE POSITION
Tobacco Control? Whatever for?
Foreign Policy? Participate in Olympics, that's enough.
Countering Terrorism? Quid pro quo; try leaving them alone.
Funding for birth control? Heaven forbid!
Sex education? Naaaah.... trust your instincts.
National defense? Use Pentagon as homeless rat shelter.
Social Security? Try hoarding food in the corners of your cages.
Campaign financing? Just send us a couple walnuts for now, thanks.

btw, is it a good idea to microwave.....