What's red, about the size of a baked bean and melts in your mouth?
......A Leper's Clitoris!
BBC News: Health experts say that you should have at least 2 days a week without alcohol. Well if my calculations are correct, I sleep 9 hours a day, which equals Just over 2 and a half days.. Job done...I'll drink to that.
Young man walking along pier sees an old man with his shoes off, trousers rolled up, legs dangling in the water & fishing with an imaginary rod! Puzzled, young man asks,"wot u up 2 mate?" "fishing for fannys!" Young man says "fishing for fannys? sounds good" "can l have a go?" "Of course u can, pull up a pew son." he sits down, casts out an imaginary rod & says "so, how many fannys have u caught so far?" old guy says "ur the 3rd this morning!"...
I've just bought some of that 007 Viagra.
......It makes you roger more!
Woman admiring a big diamond ring in jewellers. She leans forward for a closer look when a fart sneaks out, hoping no one noticed she asks 'how much is this?' Jeweller replies 'Madam, if you farted just looking at it you'll s**t yourself when you hear the price!'
10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope & Johnny Cash, Now we have no jobs, no hope & no cash
Whats 6inches long and starts with a P?
...... A jobby!
My mate was the fittest person I know. He went to the gym 7 days a week. Ran in Ironman races, he even did back to back marathons once. Then one day he went for a jog in the park and BANG! He met a girl, got married... ...and now he's a fat c-word like the rest of us.
......A Leper's Clitoris!
BBC News: Health experts say that you should have at least 2 days a week without alcohol. Well if my calculations are correct, I sleep 9 hours a day, which equals Just over 2 and a half days.. Job done...I'll drink to that.
Young man walking along pier sees an old man with his shoes off, trousers rolled up, legs dangling in the water & fishing with an imaginary rod! Puzzled, young man asks,"wot u up 2 mate?" "fishing for fannys!" Young man says "fishing for fannys? sounds good" "can l have a go?" "Of course u can, pull up a pew son." he sits down, casts out an imaginary rod & says "so, how many fannys have u caught so far?" old guy says "ur the 3rd this morning!"...
I've just bought some of that 007 Viagra.
......It makes you roger more!
Woman admiring a big diamond ring in jewellers. She leans forward for a closer look when a fart sneaks out, hoping no one noticed she asks 'how much is this?' Jeweller replies 'Madam, if you farted just looking at it you'll s**t yourself when you hear the price!'
10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope & Johnny Cash, Now we have no jobs, no hope & no cash
Whats 6inches long and starts with a P?
...... A jobby!
My mate was the fittest person I know. He went to the gym 7 days a week. Ran in Ironman races, he even did back to back marathons once. Then one day he went for a jog in the park and BANG! He met a girl, got married... ...and now he's a fat c-word like the rest of us.
