This sick hobby (warning--quitting gambling rant)

[silcnlayc]

Gambling is an addiction. I was 8 when I was first introduced to it by my father. I had a $2 winning ticket at the race track and thats all she wrote.

I have learned to moderate my gambling with the attitude of , tomorrow will also be another day. I didn't quit, for I have tried and the urge was even more powerful, so I knew that I had to do something for myself and that was to get a hold of it as tightly as it held me.

Now, when I play online, I have a goal to reach and if it is reached, I cashout. If I lose, I log off and play in fun mode for "practice" until I feel the urge is gone (boredom sets in and I leave the computer.) this is my way to control my gambling for I know I have tried all other courses, and I know I DON"T WANT HELP for I like to gamble more than I want to quit.

But I knew there must be a medium somewhere and I learned to control myself this way. I fall off the wagon every once in a while (when I have a large win and play most of it back at times which infuriates me) but it has happened less and less to almost once ever 10 withdrawals, which is acceptable to me for I am still ahead on withdrawals since I implemented this pattern ten years ago.

They say if you do it for 21 days (repitition of play) then you have a pattern set and a mind change. It took me 30 days to set my pattern.

I learned to spend more time with my husband this way, knowing if I blow my stash in one go..I am outta there!

I hope you can find that medium to control the urges to play online, for it is truly an awful thing to live with at times, but it also can be more enjoyable when you get to control IT rather than let it control you.

We all have choices and to choose to master this, you must believe you are the stronger of the two.

Good luck in your road to freedom!

[amatrine]

I admit it is boredom that does me in. Having been disabled and unable to work for years, I found it way to escape these walls.

Good news is I am finaly recovering from the disability . I went to work for week, but had an allergic reaction the the chemicals I worked with and was in the hospital in one week, that sucked, but during that week I did not gamble. I was so happy just to be out of this house! Also , I now know I CAN work, wich has lifted years of depression, and I have been doing interviews all month, and just had what I think was a sucessful interveiw with a very good comany. Can be stressful finding a job being a woman in a mans feild,
and having a 6 year gap on my resume. Also being 35 not 25. But Im still happy at the PROSPECT of getting out this house! I too spent everything that was extra online gambling. I hate shopping, and buy most of what I need online,lol But Instead of saving any income I made at home say torwards a home downpayment, I would just blow it. It made me depressed. I am on a break rite now, and have erased all the online casinos and have been spending my efforts into finding a job . I sold my affilaite website , as that just tempts me more to spend money,lol All I did with the earnings was gamble them anyway, though it was fun running it, in a sense it gave me something to do.

I had to look at why I was gambling so much. I know it was boredom for me,
and so I am findng ways to overcome boredom and I find the thought of sitting at this computer spending more money at this time, just makes me feel sick. It just reminds me of being bored and sick. I honestly woul still be doing it if I were still ill and no options to get out of this house. Im just thankful I am finaly feeling better) And mabey after I get working a while , I may throw a little bit in here for fun, and have it actualy be FUN again, not something to do because there is nothing else to do

Ama

[Austin49]

I guess for me, it's a compulsive personality. I know people who can have one or 2 cigs a day and they never go beyond that. For me, I just an not able to have that kind of control.

I am happy I'm not a drinker. Otherwise I'd have a triple addiction.

To those who can control their gambling, I'm happy for them. It is alot of fun! When I got my visa bill this month, I knew I was out of control. It was like someone punched me in the stomach.

Anyway, best wishes to everyone!

[Jeff]

If I see all the winner screenshots, I allways had the hope to get the same wins. But I think I am a player with no luck. May be I played wrong (only slots).

But for now I will stop my online gambling at least for two month and to see if I have more money at the end of the month.

[NextToYou]

Originally Posted by MrVan

but other than KasinoKing, aka23, and granny I highly doubt that there are many people out there are ahead overall.

You are wrong here. There are many people that are ahead, but just does not want to brag about it in the public forums for different reasons.

[bdangel]

I read this topic with some fascination. I play some casinos, but living on a social security income it is hard to fund accts all the time. I disciplined myself in this regard as i take 50 dollars a month for online gaming. This is my entertainment.

I can hear some saying that is not much, but i have made many withdrawls. I also disciplined myself to hit that withdrawl button and not put my winnings back in. This goes into neteller so i can play different casino.

My advise is never use your living expences to gamble! Make a budget, and stick to it! Make sure your bills are paid and only use what you can afford to lose. Oh by the way...i never look at winning screenshots any more...to depressing...lol

I have been in the situation where i was using my living expenses to gamble...it really takes discipline to stop doing that. I am happy now and so is my bank acct....good luck to you in stopping gambling.

[amatrine]

Good news! I just got hired!!!! (comment on my earlier post)

Start Wensday, in tool and dye))

Im out of this house)))))

Ama

[GrandMaster]

Congratulations! Well done!

[Cynthia777]

I'm kinda glad someone posted this thread. MrVan, the best thing you've done here in this situation is admit that it can be a problem..and no one should really be shunned for it (as long as they recognize it before they get in any deeper).

I have definitely been there, whether its online or at the B&Ms, state lottery, etc..you name it. It is a pretty bad feeling when you have to "beat the bank" to make sure your checks clear, or find yourself going back to the ATM time and again, and heck.. even counting change in the car to make sure you have the toll money to get back (happened to me, luckily, this tow truck driver stopped and said something (I think he could tell cuz I was down the street from the casino early in the morning parked at this 7-Eleven), gave me toll money and enough for a cup of coffee...he too, had been there.

That was quite awhile back and I'm making better money now in my job..but still..it gets outta control once in awhile where even if I didn't need the money for bills and had extra left over.. I could have spent it on so many other things that I definitely could say I had something to show for my money.

Its difficult to draw the line between recreation and what can become a compulsive hobby. I think at times when I "lost control" is primarily when I didn't have enough money for what I needed and saw this as the only way out..believe me, it never works (so to speak, turn a dollar into a hundred).. at least..not when YOU REALLY NEED IT and are acting in haste. And you end up in an even worse position.

I think the biggest loss at times is the time that can be taken up when gambling gets out of control. I am being frank here, because I think it helps even better to hear it from someone who has been there, so yes, I've made mistakes and just have to be sure to never forget them. I have missed beautiful weather days and times that I could have spent visiting friends and family, missed sleep, being late to work, and cramming things I've needed to do in a hurry and stressful rush because I've spent most of the weekend sitting in front of the computer, or even at the B&Ms..I've watched the sun go down and come back up again, and finally left when the sun was going down again..so tired that I was afraid I wouldn't make the drive home. I've seen shifts change at the convenience store playing Keno for hours. Yes, this is absolutely ridiculous. But one only knows what it's like when they are in that position.

I really do enjoy gambling, the thrill and excitement of it, and some of the things that accompany it.. but you really have to live and learn, and if you can find that appropriate balance then you truly are lucky. If not, the best thing to do is to stay away from it, and enjoy all of the other things in life.

I wish you all the best, MrVan..and any others that feel that they are in this same position. It is not too late.

[MrVan]

Wow all I can say is THANK YOU everyone. Your support means so much to me and I know I will be happy again soon. I am surprised that this many people responded... it seems like there are many people out there trying to quit. I really appreciate it though. I thought this thread would be mostly ignored.

Thanks everyone