Gambling

[funky_seagull]

Hi I haven't been on here for a while. I have been through one of the most difficult times of my life. Just wanted to share what I've been through in the hope it may help someone. My gambling got out of control and I lost everything. I got into serious debt I couldn't pay back. I may end up being made bankrupt. As you can imagine this has put incredible strain on my relationship with my wife. To the point we may end up splitting up, this is not good because I have a son who will be the one who suffers the most because of this. At the moment I am afraid to answer the door in case it is the bailiffs, and I am constantly hassled by phonecalls and letters to pay what I owe. I am not saying gambling is evil. If you can be in control then it is a bit of fun. But it was wrong for me and got to the stage where it wasn't fun anymore. It became hell. I have an addictive personality and it is my own stupid fault I got into this mess, and I have only myself to blame. I have had a nervous breakdown because of this and only just starting to recover. I wanted to post this because if there is someone struggling with gambling like I was, I am hoping this message will help them stop. I have hit rockbottom and may end up not just being bankrupt but losing my family as well. This is the reality of what can happen if a gambling problem is not stopped. If anyone is reading this and feels they may have a gambling problem. Please go and get help. Don't end up with nothing and destroying your life, like I have. It is the most horrible feeling, to know you lost everything. You can't win, the house edge is against you. If like me you can't stay in control then stop before it is too late. I really hate myself for what I've done.

 

[jas2587]

Funky_Seagull I am sorry that the gambling bug got a hold of you this bad I would hope that you are going to counsaling (sp) for Gambling an one for putting your family back together
I do hope an will say a prayer that all turns out fot you


Good Luck an Thoughts are with you

Cindy

 

[Stovetopp]

Hi Funky_seagull

I amvery sorry to hear of your predicament....I don't know your age but remember you still have your whole life ahead of you. Just never look back , and in looking forward only do positive things and pray God, try to learn from your mistakes of the past.

You would be surprised how things changes in life. S*it does happenbut the key is how to cope with misfortune Just get your "support" group behind you.

 

[SlotMonster]

I can't even say a word
And of cource I hope you will recover from your losses and all will be ok with you and your family! Do you still have a job or any other source of income?
Take care, man!

 

[love2winalot]

Hiya: It takes Balls to post what you just did.....

Hating your self will only make things worse. Whats done is done. Bankruptcy is not the end of the world. Just ask the millions who have done it. Your marriage is still salvageable. How do i know this? Because, if she really wanted to leave you, would she not have done so already? All you have to do is eliminate the reasons she would want to leave, and reinfore the reasons you got married in the first place.

If you have an addictive personality, then use it to become addicted to saving your marriage..........Nothing else matters, and nothing else hurts as much if you fail. I know, i had it happen to me, "not because of gambling", 24 years ago when i lost my wife, and 3 kids.

Stuff happens. Everyone gets knocked down once in a while, and some more than others, BUT THE ONES THAT KEEP GETTING BACK UP, are the ones that end up Winning in the game of life. Not because they are better than anyone else, but because they simply refused to Lose. Good luck to you.

 

[missmichelle]

Thanks for posting this in the hopes that it will stop someone from going down that same road. All my good thoughts are with you and your wife, that you may get through this together.

Michelle

 

[RedAndi]

Seagull you advise people with a problem to go get help, I hope you yourself have done the same.
That you say you hate yourself both worries me and resonates. I have had times when I felt exactly the same as you, so I know what you are dealing with. The good thing is it sounds like you know now what has to be done and can start picking up the pieces and rebuilding. I wish you very well and hope you can stay strong to get through this.

Thank you for your post.

 

[dominique]

Thanks for the post, seagull, and all the best to you!

Here is an excerpt from my site that I have gotten good feedback on:

Some of the warning signals of a destructive gambling habit are:
You spend increasing amounts of time gambling
You spend increasing amounts of money gambling
You are trying to "win your money back", you are chasing your losses
You are trying to hide your activities from others
Your gambling interferes with work
Your gambling interferes with your social life
If any of the above points apply to you, you should stop gambling.


Some of the steps to take to help you stop:
Tell all the casinos where you have played to close your accounts. This applies both online and offline.
Open a new email account, tell your friends and those businesses you want to do business with about it, and close your old email account.
Start a new hobby. You need to replace the destructive habit with a constructive one.
Get help!!! Below you will find a list of places that will help you.


Here are links to organizations that provide help to problem gamblers:


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blocks access to online Gambling

I hope anyone who finds temselves in a downhill gambling spiral will contact the above and get help.

 

[nisosbar]

Hi - I am very sad that this happened to you, but I am, at the same time, glad and encouraged that you could come here and share your experience. It may help others to avoid this outcome.

And no matter how bad things may seem right now, I've had days and periods in my life like that, and things ALWAYS got better. Please get counseling if you aren't getting any now, and vow to try to stay away from gambling.

Best wishes to you and your family, and let us know how things go. I would love to hear.

 

[slotjunkie]

Hi I haven't been on here for a while. I have been through one of the most difficult times of my life. Just wanted to share what I've been through in the hope it may help someone. My gambling got out of control and I lost everything. I got into serious debt I couldn't pay back. I may end up being made bankrupt. As you can imagine this has put incredible strain on my relationship with my wife. To the point we may end up splitting up, this is not good because I have a son who will be the one who suffers the most because of this. At the moment I am afraid to answer the door in case it is the bailiffs, and I am constantly hassled by phonecalls and letters to pay what I owe. I am not saying gambling is evil. If you can be in control then it is a bit of fun. But it was wrong for me and got to the stage where it wasn't fun anymore. It became hell. I have an addictive personality and it is my own stupid fault I got into this mess, and I have only myself to blame. I have had a nervous breakdown because of this and only just starting to recover. I wanted to post this because if there is someone struggling with gambling like I was, I am hoping this message will help them stop. I have hit rockbottom and may end up not just being bankrupt but losing my family as well. This is the reality of what can happen if a gambling problem is not stopped. If anyone is reading this and feels they may have a gambling problem. Please go and get help. Don't end up with nothing and destroying your life, like I have. It is the most horrible feeling, to know you lost everything. You can't win, the house edge is against you. If like me you can't stay in control then stop before it is too late. I really hate myself for what I've done.

I applaud you for coming forth with such painfully personal information! I am very sorry that it got so bad for you, but am happy to hear that you are taking steps to get your life back on track. I pray that your wife/family has mercy on you and forgive you and walk with you on your journey to recovery. I promise you, your testimony has helped someone! God Bless you and good luck!

 

[slotjunkie]

Hiya: It takes Balls to post what you just did.....

Hating your self will only make things worse. Whats done is done. Bankruptcy is not the end of the world. Just ask the millions who have done it. Your marriage is still salvageable. How do i know this? Because, if she really wanted to leave you, would she not have done so already? All you have to do is eliminate the reasons she would want to leave, and reinfore the reasons you got married in the first place.

If you have an addictive personality, then use it to become addicted to saving your marriage..........Nothing else matters, and nothing else hurts as much if you fail. I know, i had it happen to me, "not because of gambling", 24 years ago when i lost my wife, and 3 kids.

Stuff happens. Everyone gets knocked down once in a while, and some more than others, BUT THE ONES THAT KEEP GETTING BACK UP, are the ones that end up Winning in the game of life. Not because they are better than anyone else, but because they simply refused to Lose. Good luck to you.

These are some of the most positive, meaningful, beautiful words of advice I have every heard! Thank you!

 

[jetset]

You've already taken the first, and probably most important step toward recovery by acknowledging that you have a problem and wanting to fix it, and my best wishes go out to you in achieving that Funky_Seagull.

Love2winalot is right - family is your paramount concern now and there does appear to be a chance to retrieve your marriage - but you will have to be firm in your resolve to never gamble again to keep your wife's trust going forward.

And you must get help and support.

Holding thumbs for you!

 

[SlotMonster]

Just few words to add for funky_seagull: as you told in your first post that you have addictive personality, I think now it's time to become addictive to WORK. Do your job like never before, try to find underworking or something else (free-lance is also good for you). You have a wife and kids and you MUST take care about them, so now it's "that" time to do your best and get your life better.

To all forum members: we have a great community here, and one of our members really needs help. I think we should do something for him. I don't mean to cover all his losses, but a little financial help would be very opportunely.

 

[bryand]

I too want to thank you bravely sharing your innermost pain. I know from experience how destructive and baffling addiction can be.

For what its worth, I suggest that you support your wife in also seeking help from a support group. I hope and pray it brings you back closer together and stronger than ever.

 

[DiamondGeezer]

Gutted for you Funky_Seagull. I've always rated your posts here.

You clearly are a clever person so I think you can find a solution to all this. May not be much help but I personally know a guy who lost his house through slots addiction and he has conquered it and turned things round.

All the best.

 

[funky_seagull]

Thanks

I really want to say thanks to everyone who replied to my post. Your kind words really meant a lot to me. Shortly after posting this thread I got ill with pneumonia. Not sure if this was to do with low immune system due to worry, anyway getting much better now, still pretty weak, but survived the worst of it. As horrible as an illness is, it helped me and my wife get closer together. It also caused me to get back in contact with my Dad whom I haven't spoken to in a while. He is just coming out of bankruptcy and is helping me with sorting out my debt. He got me in contact with the CCCS (Credit Consumer Council) and thanks to their help, I have managed to put off bankruptcy at least for a month anyway. I have another meeting with my creditors at the end of April, hopefully now with the help of the CCCS will be able to negotiate a payment plan were I can pay them a set amount each month I can afford, without struggling to meet living expenses. If anyone else here in the UK is struggling with debt I really recommend you get in touch with the CCCS. They are free and a real help. I'm not out of the water by a long shot and bankruptcy is still a real possibility, but at least things are getting sorted. I have decided not to gamble anymore, as for me it is too dangerous. I really am not against it or anything and don't think bad of it. This whole mess is completely my fault. I wish I had got help before it got this far, but I can't change what has happened now. The only thing I can do is change my future to a brighter one by trying to make the right choices from now on. Something I have found to be a great help is writing. And have written 3 chapters of a book. I am trying to use my addictive personality in a positive way by getting addicted to writing instead of gambling. It really does seem to help stop that horrible urge to gamble. It is much better, because at the end of a writing session, you have something to show for your time, something creative that you made, which makes you feel good. Whereas at the end of a gambling session all you have is less money or more money, but nothing of lasting worth really, money disappears, and can be lost again in another session. However something you have created, it can't be gambled away.

I still want to be a part of this forum, even though I have quit gambling. I have a few years experience with online casinos and if I can help anyone with questions about them, I will try. Or if someone needs support, who is going through it, and finds gambling is no longer fun, but has become a hell. I will do my best to help them. If anyone wants someone to talk to in confidence about a gambling problem PM me anytime and I will do my best to try and help you find a way out of the nightmare. Once again thanks everybody for your kind words and input, it really cheered me up.

 

[Cant_Get_Right]

I really want to say thanks to everyone who replied to my post. Your kind words really meant a lot to me. Shortly after posting this thread I got ill with pneumonia. Not sure if this was to do with low immune system due to worry, anyway getting much better now, still pretty weak, but survived the worst of it. As horrible as an illness is, it helped me and my wife get closer together. It also caused me to get back in contact with my Dad whom I haven't spoken to in a while. He is just coming out of bankruptcy and is helping me with sorting out my debt. He got me in contact with the CCCS (Credit Consumer Council) and thanks to their help, I have managed to put off bankruptcy at least for a month anyway. I have another meeting with my creditors at the end of April, hopefully now with the help of the CCCS will be able to negotiate a payment plan were I can pay them a set amount each month I can afford, without struggling to meet living expenses. If anyone else here in the UK is struggling with debt I really recommend you get in touch with the CCCS. They are free and a real help. I'm not out of the water by a long shot and bankruptcy is still a real possibility, but at least things are getting sorted. I have decided not to gamble anymore, as for me it is too dangerous. I really am not against it or anything and don't think bad of it. This whole mess is completely my fault. I wish I had got help before it got this far, but I can't change what has happened now. The only thing I can do is change my future to a brighter one by trying to make the right choices from now on. Something I have found to be a great help is writing. And have written 3 chapters of a book. I am trying to use my addictive personality in a positive way by getting addicted to writing instead of gambling. It really does seem to help stop that horrible urge to gamble. It is much better, because at the end of a writing session, you have something to show for your time, something creative that you made, which makes you feel good. Whereas at the end of a gambling session all you have is less money or more money, but nothing of lasting worth really, money disappears, and can be lost again in another session. However something you have created, it can't be gambled away.

I still want to be a part of this forum, even though I have quit gambling. I have a few years experience with online casinos and if I can help anyone with questions about them, I will try. Or if someone needs support, who is going through it, and finds gambling is no longer fun, but has become a hell. I will do my best to help them. If anyone wants someone to talk to in confidence about a gambling problem PM me anytime and I will do my best to try and help you find a way out of the nightmare. Once again thanks everybody for your kind words and input, it really cheered me up.

Funky, this form of entertainment has nearly destroyed your life. Please take it very serious. Gambling is a respecter of NO ONE! I know you like poping in this forum every now and then. BUT in all due respect. Don't visit here anymore. Go invest $25 or $30 and buy Gamblock for your computer. This will be one of the best investment you will make. Trust me! Temptation is a MFer. When you seem like you got yourself under control and out of debt. Temptation will sneak in and bring you right back down. So please stay away! GO BUY/DOWNLOAD GAMBLOCK RIGHT NOW!!!!