Online Casinos - Casinomeister Logo Online Casinos - Casinomeister

Go Back   Casinomeister's Online Casino and Poker Forum > Jokes, Birthdays, and the Attic > Jokes

Notices

Jokes Enter at your own risk. May contain adult language like •••• and ••••!

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 16th April 2008, 03:11 PM
BingoT's Avatar
Working with Kids
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Hartford,Ct
Posts: 2,569
WTGs: 2
WTGd at 101 Times in 59 Posts
Thanks: 637
Thanked 1,516 Times in 1,040 Posts
Nominated 0 Times in 0 Posts
TOTW/F/M Award(s): 0
Reputation Points: 8028
Rep Power: 69
BingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond reputeBingoT has a reputation beyond repute
George Carlin on aging!

George Carlin on aging!


Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions. 'How old are you?' 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead. 'How old are you?' 'I'm gonna be 16!' You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life ! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!! But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed? You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone. But wait!!!You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would! So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 andMAKE it to 60. You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday! You get into your 80's and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; 'I Was JUST 92.' Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. 'I'm 100 and a half!' May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!! HOW TO STAY YOUNG1. Throw out nonessential numbers.This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them That is why you pay 'them.' 2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. 3. Keep learning.Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name isAlzheimer's. 4. Enjoy the simple things.5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. 6.The tears happen.Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive. 7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.Your home is your refuge. 8.Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help. 9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is. 10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.AND ALWAYS REMEMBER: Life is not measured by the number of breaths wetake, but by the moments that take our breath away.
__________________
BingoT's Place Bingo T's To find all the Rival casinos & more BingoT's Place
Go With The Best Rival Casinos(Irish Luck BingoT's Gift special
Jinnia's & Tom's place Great Jokes At BingoT's
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are On
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
George Carlin's View on Aging BingoT Jokes 0 25th May 2007 03:22 PM
stay away from Tex/George at Spanish Luck casino sponge63 Casino Complaints - Non-Bonus Issues 2 14th August 2006 02:02 PM
George Carlin's New Rules For 2006 We all know he's funny BingoT Jokes 1 20th March 2006 01:29 AM
George Bush Is Not Stupid Convention Black21Jack Jokes 0 8th November 2004 04:44 AM


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 07:28 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.2.0
© All Rights Reserved, 1998-2008
Inactive Reminders By Mished.co.uk