Stunning story man. I think you are within the category of people where gambling just changed the brain. Getting away from it is so frigging hard. But there's hope. Try to search for detox in africa or some shit. I've heard several people went through there with all sorts of addictions. They seemed to come back reborn. Understand that the nature of these stupid games is extremely addicting. And it does'nt take a gambling addict to become addicted, you know?
Changing the brain I like it mate. It must be that, I’m intelligent-ish, have a good job and get to travel the world. There is just something about the rush of gambling that cannot be beaten.
To hide this to those that I don’t want to share it with I always say my sky dive in New Zealand was better than an orgasm which it is but nothing better than hitting the big top on a slot
Oh and my friend has used that story in a stand up routine, that and the one of me nearly shiting myself in the Outback