Gambling is all about dopamine. Your being rewarded basicly when you press spin. It gives a great sensation when your winning, but an awefull experience when losing. Some long-term gamblers who won serious amount of handpays (i've spoken to a few, even ones who got married in a landbased casino) would rather feel annoyed by getting the machine locked in a call attendant status for getting a handpay. Its because it blocks or stops the event of having dopamine.
This is why you often see older females behind slots. The experience they get by winning (and thus perhaps even losing) is so overwelming and devastating at the same time. My own trick is when i get a bit of too much of this, to simply stop and do something else. Because i know the rush of winning could be archieved by playing a game online, doing psysical sports, having sex etc. You just have to go back to that moment.
It takes a bit of disipline, to know when to stop, know when not to play. I've had my fair share too of winning 8k, and putting 2 withdrawls of 5 + 3 k, go out of the house, come back, and replay it all. I've learned that with the next times this happend simply to leave it as it is, and not come back untill the withdrawl is actually processed and on my bank account. Maybe this helps other problem gamblers on how to deal with it as well.
I feel sorry for OP. You clearly have'nt understood what getting help means.