Man gets arrested for "doin" his picnic table

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My husband just called me and said he heard this on the radio. We live in Massachusetts, so I'm assuming it was around here.

A man got arrested for taking out the umbrella to the picnic table and "having fun" with the ummmm, empty spot left.

Right in his backyard, (he did it 4 times) he is married with 3 children and lives within a school zone. I can't remember the charges, indecent exposure I'm assuming and a few others.

Ummm, how "hard up" do you have to be to do this? :what:
 

winbig

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My husband just called me and said he heard this on the radio. We live in Massachusetts, so I'm assuming it was around here.

A man got arrested for taking out the umbrella to the picnic table and "having fun" with the ummmm, empty spot left.

Right in his backyard, (he did it 4 times) he is married with 3 children and lives within a school zone. I can't remember the charges, indecent exposure I'm assuming and a few others.

Ummm, how "hard up" do you have to be to do this? :what:

Married with 3 children, that says it all right there. :lolup:

I surely hope the table wasn't wooden....can we say splinters? :OUCH:
 

bb28

Meister Member
If he got a few splinters, maybe it added to his experience. :D:D

Actually he probably deserved getting a few splinters. :)
 

bryand

Beach Bum
Ummm, how "hard up" do you have to be to do this?
I heard Bob Villa say that outdoor unbrellas may need added adhesive at the base for more windy climates. Just a thought.
 

winbig

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Full story - First hit on google for 'arrested picnic table' :rolleyes:

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(BELLEVUE, OH) -- Police say a man in Bellevue, Ohio was caught on tape having sex with a picnic table.

Bellevue Police Captain Matt Johnson says Art Price, Jr., 40, was seen on four occasions between the hours of 10:30 a.m. and noon having sex with his picnic table. What makes this a felony, Johnson says, is that it took place in close proximity to a school, which made it likely that children could have seen Price.

The neighbor -- who wishes to remain anonymous -- saw Price walk out onto his deck, stand a round metal table on its side and use the hole in the umbrella to have sex.

The most recent instance took place March 14, we're told. A neighbor videotaped Price.

"The first video we had, he was completely nude. He would use the hole from the umbrella and have sex with the table," Johnson says.

Police say Price admitted to the crimes -- four charges of public indecency. Usually these sorts of things are misdemeanors, but in this case, they are felonies.

"What boosts it up to a felony is that the statute says if it's likely to be viewed by a minor," Johnson explains.

The Price family did not want to talk with us, but neighbors did. Some are not happy Price was released on his own recognizance.

"He shouldn't be allowed just for the fact that he could do that again -- and nude that close to a school. That should be zero tolerance," says Brice Jacobs, a neighbor.

Price is married with three school-aged children. Neighbors tell us they're now worried about the kids.

"Hopefully it stays between the adults and the kids don't get a lot of the information so they aren't so cruel to the little kids," says Emily Grote, a neighbor.

This case has police in this small town shaking their heads. "Once you think you've seen it all, something else comes around," Johnson says.
 

bb28

Meister Member
It seems that a few of you.......not calling out any names or anything like that :eek: like your news a little strange. :D:D
I just happen to know about this site called Fark, (a little birdie told me) ;). Check it out. www.fark.com
Always good for a laugh.......and a what the heck were they thinking!
 

winbig

Keep winning this amount.
It seems that a few of you.......not calling out any names or anything like that :eek: like your news a little strange. :D:D
I just happen to know about this site called Fark, (a little birdie told me) ;). Check it out. www.fark.com
Always good for a laugh.......and a what the heck were they thinking!
And if you want some REALLY weird stories (but true) head over to www.darwinawards.com
 

winbig

Keep winning this amount.
Here's a great one:

What goes up must come down."

(20 June 2007, South Carolina) A passing cabbie found a 21 year-old couple Znaked and injured in the road an hour before sunrise. The two people died at the nearest hospital without regaining consciousness. Authorities were at a loss to explain what had happened. There were no witnesses, no trace of clothing, and no wrecked cars or motorcycles.

Investigators eventually found a clue high on the roof of a nearby building: two sets of neatly folded clothes. Safe sex takes on a whole new meaning when you are perched on the edge of a pyramid-shaped metal roof. "It appears as if [they] accidentally fell off the roof," Sgt. Florence McCants said.

This is a true Darwin Award trifecta: TWO people die, WHILE in the act of procreation, due to an ASTONISHINGLY poor decision. Bottom line: If you put yourself in a precarious "position" at the edge of a pointy roof, you may well find yourself coming and going at the same time.

Ironically, one of the deceased was named "Tumbleston."
(Some reports list the name as "Tubleston.")
 

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