Im procrastinating...

[Realitybitez]

I just found out from one my relos that my cousins husband died this morning in a motorbike accident and I know I should ring her but I have no idea what to say....

It came right on the heels of finding out seventh 777 was no longer with us (god bless his soul) and though I didnt know him that well, it was still really sad and depressing and now finding out my cousins hubby died?

Honestly, what does one say to someone who has lost a loved one?

 

[dionysus]

I'm sorry sounds trite, but letting someone know youre there for them is always good. Sometimes just a kind voice and a person willing to listen is enough

 

[Realitybitez]

I'm sorry sounds trite, but letting someone know youre there for them is always good. Sometimes just a kind voice and a person willing to listen is enough

Im procrastinating writing on here because Im afraid to ring her, not sure what say. Scared I'll say the wrong thing. Yet really, she only has us so I need to do this. Just to let her know, we're here and we care but Im sooo bad at expressing myself verbally I'll probably muck it all up

 

[dionysus]

Have faith and stay strong; sometimes people borrow strength and maybe she can get it from you. Just let her know she doesnt have to shoulder the burden alone. Let her guide the conversation. Just begin by saying youre calling to make sure shes ok, and if she needs anything not to hesitate to tell you. Stop procrastinating, and call. Youll be fine. Honestly, situations like these are SUPPOSED to be uncomfortable and there's no wrong or right answers

 

[Realitybitez]

Have faith and stay strong; sometimes people borrow strength and maybe she can get it from you. Just let her know she doesnt have to shoulder the burden alone. Let her guide the conversation. Just begin by saying youre calling to make sure shes ok, and if she needs anything not to hesitate to tell you. Stop procrastinating, and call. Youll be fine. Honestly, situations like these are SUPPOSED to be uncomfortable and there's no wrong or right answers

Your right... Ok, Im going to do this. I have to do this. She needs us right now. Thanks dionysus

 

[colly]

From experience of having lost those closest to me- its just the fact that you have rung or turned up on the doorstop - something in person- that matters- the content of what you say isn't vital- heck when greiving half of whats said and whats going on around you doesn't register- its the human content that other people care thats important- Just pick up the phone or go round there (and i/s sorry is fine to say - its true)

 

[chayton]

Yes, a simple "I'm so sorry" and "I'm here for you" are really the most important things you can say.

 

[Jasminebed]

I've lost a lot of loved ones, a sincere I'm sorry (or so sad) for your loss is never inappropriate. While it's good to ask if there is anything you can do, we are often so shell-shocked we have no answer. If you can offer to do something (would you like me to phone certain people, can I give you a lift anywhere, babysit the pets, bring over some dinner?) that's a little better. Even if what you offer is not what's needed, it shows that the offer of help is more than mere words, and might prompt them to ask something else.

I'm sorry for your loss, and my condolences to your cousin.