Honesty--- The best policy

[Jasminebed]

In light of a recent thread, which is not the purpose of this discussion, I thought I'd have a spot for stories and anecdotes from our members on occasions where we have found things, got home from the store and found out cashier made a mistake, our had our lost things returned, etc.

I will start with one of my own favourites from my beloved Aunt Maude.

Back in the 40's, she'd been out doing shopping and errands, and arrived home to find she had $10 too much change. This was much more money back then, and it didn't take her too long to figure out a local jewellery store had given back too much when she had picked up a watch in for repair.

Unable to return until the following Saturday, she went back to the store to inform them they had made a mistake in her change the week before. Before she could finish, the salesman drew himself haughtily up and said "Madam, we do not make mistakes here".

She thanked him and left with the $10.

 

[chayton]

I watched a hidden camera experiment once where someone left an expensive cell phone in a public place and watched to see who would return it and who would keep it. Surprisingly most people returned it, including several homeless people. The one guy who stuck it in his pocket and then denied it when confronted? The security guard.

 

[petro]

Just last week I was playing in a mini-casino and I went to get some change from the change machine. The slots in my country take $1 coins.
When I got my change I noticed that I got $5 too much and realised it belonged to the person who had used the machine a moment before.
I gave it back to him and he thanked me.

I will play down credits on machines that have been abandoned and I will also pick up coins that I find on the floor or in the trough of machines, but I'm not a thief.

Last week someone had also abandoned an unopened can of cola and bourbon near a pub. I took it and drank it. lol

Oh, and before I forget, on the front footpath near a mini-casino, someone must have accidentally dropped their money. I found about $7 in change. I thought; "My lucky day!"

Don't worry about your "lost and abandoned" stuff, it's going to a good cause. I.e.: me. :icon_twis

 

[Jasminebed]

My child found a cell phone when she was maybe 10 or so. There was an entry for Mom in the address book, so I called it to ask if their son or daughter had lost a cell. This was nearly 20 years ago, and cellphones were all very expensive. In due course the man arrived to pick it up. We lived in a very modest home in a poorer neighbourhood, and she was barely given a thank you, let alone a reward.

While I know we all try to teach our children to do the right thing because it is the right thing, and not for a reward, I don't think a dollar would have mattered that much to that man.

At that time, we lived not very far from a Pager centre, and their pagers all said $25 reward, if found call xxx-xxxx. As luck would have it, didn't she find one of these and get to claim the reward!

 

[maxd]

The one guy who stuck it in his pocket and then denied it when confronted? The security guard.

Don't neglect that fact that the security guard probably only gets paid minimum wage and had likely been asked/forced to work unpaid over-time because some wanker had lost their cell phone and complained about it. Just saying.

Some years ago I was in a busy train station in Vancouver and I found an expensive-looking briefcase left against a pillar of public phones. Tooled leather, monogrammed, combination lock that looked decidedly custom made, the business. I held it up and signalled to the security people -- this was years before 9/11 -- and they just shrugged me off and wanted nothing to do with it. So I called out "has anyone forgotten their briefcase?". Everyone passing through looked at me like I had just defecated on the floor in that very public place. I tried again a few minutes later, same response. Eventually the police showed up, took my details and relieved me of my responsibilities. A week or so later I got an anonymous call from what sounded like an elderly woman of British extraction thanking me for my "kindness" in seeing the case "into the right hands". I never heard nor learned anything more about it, nor did I particularly care. Sure would have liked to have known what was in the damn thing though.

 

[petro]

A week or so later I got an anonymous call from what sounded like an elderly woman of British extraction thanking me for my "kindness" in seeing the case "into the right hands".

What do the quotation marks mean Max? You got me curious now.

Oh, it could be like actually quoting the lady. I thought it had a double meaning for a minute.

 

[Googobucs]

I always believe that honesty is the best policy. Not just when dealing with things of value but in everything. I believe that a man/woman's integrity is sacred and you should hold yourself to high standards. I hold myself to high standards and expect others to treat me with the same respect I give to them.

I tell my employee's all the time. You're allowed to make mistakes, but when you do please own up to it. If you lie to me about it we will be done. With the truth we have a chance to resolve the situation properly.
I can forgive your mistake, I will have a hard time forgiving your deceit.

If I find something or was given too much change I would always do my due diligence to return it to it's owner.

Now, having said that.....If I found a bag full of cash in the alley behind my house I don't know what I would do. I would at least think about it for a day and watch the news to see if someone was missing it. If nothing ever came up on the news, I might not turn it in thinking the police would just keep it anyway.

 

[dunover]

15 years ago, after 2 hours of rumpy-pumpy with a local frustrated single lady one night, I was getting the jitters and a guilt complex before going home at midnight to the wife. Seeing my panic-ridden face, she slid something behind my ear and said "don't worry Dun , just go back, wake her up and tell the truth."

As I quietly let myself in the front door shaking, wifey was sitting on the sofa waiting for me with a face like a bag of wasps.

"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?" she shouted.

"Ermm.. you know that blonde woman who moved in round the corner about 6 months ago? Well I've afraid I've been round hers and have had 2 hours of supercharged sex."

Jumping up, she shoots her hand to the right side of my head and holds up a stick of white chalk......"YOU LYING TWAT!" she yells, "You've been down the bloody pub playing darts with your pals again!"

 

[petro]

Now, having said that.....If I found a bag full of cash in the alley behind my house I don't know what I would do.

Australian law says in this example you must give it to the police.
Although, if the amount found is small (and it obviously doesn't belong to anyone in particular) it's okay to keep.

 

[maxd]

What do the quotation marks mean Max? ... Oh, it could be like actually quoting the lady.

Yup, just quoting. Very old-school. She said "the right hands" like it came with a wink or something. Imagine Ida Lupino with a nicotine-stained manicure and some dangerous cleavage. Watched WAY too many noir films as a kid. "Small Change got rained on with his own .38."

 

[vinylweatherman]

Australian law says in this example you must give it to the police.
Although, if the amount found is small (and it obviously doesn't belong to anyone in particular) it's okay to keep.

It's the same here, but if the police can't trace the owner, you can go and claim it after a few months.

My brother found a ring as a child and handed it to the police. A while later he went to see if it had been claimed, and as it hadn't he got to keep it.

It's not quite that clear cut though, because there is always a chance the original owner will come along and claim it at a later date, and if they do, and you still have it, you must give it back.

Many people don't bother going back to retrieve it, and eventually the police sell unclaimed stuff off at auction. The proceeds are not kept by individual officers, but end up going to "a good cause", although this could easily be the police benevolent fund or similar.

I expect if it's high value, like a bag of cash, the police will keep it longer as it could be evidence if it is later linked to a crime.

 

[mer3801]

So good to see that there are others that think like this. I've always told my kids exactly this.. "Don't lie to me. If I find out that you've lied to me, I'll have a very hard time trusting you again. If you tell me the truth, even though you may get in trouble, I guarantee it'll be a lot less trouble than you would get in if I catch you in a lie." My kids are very open with me (crossing fingers it stays that way).

I've walked out of a grocery store before, and when I got to the car, I noticed my daughter had a 75c ring pop in her hand. I asked her where she got it from, and she just looked at me. I asked if she had taken it from inside, and she wouldn't answer. Well I know that I didn't pay for it, and she was only 3, so she certainly didn't pay for it, so I loaded the groceries in the car, and walked back inside and made her give it to the cashier. The woman looked at me like I was crazy! It really upset me to see her reaction. I was trying to teach my daughter a lesson, and the cashier looked at me like 'are you serious?' ... I will continue doing it - hoping I never have to lol - because to me, teaching my children right and wrong, is far more important to me than anyones reaction.

I always believe that honesty is the best policy. Not just when dealing with things of value but in everything. I believe that a man/woman's integrity is sacred and you should hold yourself to high standards. I hold myself to high standards and expect others to treat me with the same respect I give to them.

I tell my employee's all the time. You're allowed to make mistakes, but when you do please own up to it. If you lie to me about it we will be done. With the truth we have a chance to resolve the situation properly.
I can forgive your mistake, I will have a hard time forgiving your deceit.

If I find something or was given too much change I would always do my due diligence to return it to it's owner.

Now, having said that.....If I found a bag full of cash in the alley behind my house I don't know what I would do. I would at least think about it for a day and watch the news to see if someone was missing it. If nothing ever came up on the news, I might not turn it in thinking the police would just keep it anyway.

 

[dunover]

Aside from my humorous scenario earlier in the thread, I concur that it's best to be straight. I makes you feel better as a person, you may get it returned later on in a Karma sort of way too. I have found banknotes on several occasions, wet or weathered and have kept them because it's simply impossible to identify the loser. I usually donate a similar amount to a charity if this happens.
Working at a pub years back I found a student's purse under a chair, obviously the grant had just been awarded as there was a few hundred pounds in it. She came and claimed it, very relieved the next day. Never even left a couple or quid for a pint though...
I have never claimed false overtime or ever scammed an employer, and if I need something from work that I think is spare I'll always ask. I find it easier to live worry-free permanently, than make something in the short term that could cost me a lot more later on. Like wise I encourage and coach the kids like this. And as many have mentioned here, often if you are honest enough to report any accidental excess of bonus or payment you will often be allowed to keep it. Then you spend it with a clear conscience.

 

[cpdnd31]

Working the graveyard shift at a casino we would see it all. Now keep in mind I am a Germ Freak, big time. That being said the graveyard shift we would get many ladies of the evening.
(hookers).

One night I get this women saying "hey you are you a boss lady" I said yes I am a supervisor how can I help you. She says " my money is gone I can't find it." I ask her where was her money when she lost it. Thinking she would say her purse or pocket. NO I'm not that lucky. She tells me and I quote " In my crotch" I said excuse me where? She says "well my shoe was full already so I put that roll in my crotch" I looked at her as I started itching all over and said security office is right over there I will call and tell them you are coming they can take a report. I got back to my pit. Ordered Paddles up for the rest of the night. (meaning do not touch the money use paddles only to spread on tables. LOL proceeded to shower in hand sanitizer and itch all night. Then when security came by to update me I said please find the person that took the money they are gonna need a penicillin shot. They laughed and for the rest of the month I had security and other bosses bringing me wet wipes and leaving fake rolled up money on my desk with a note saying Money found please return to the lady for us.

 

[Simmo!]

Treat other people how you want to be treated yourself is my philosophy. Plus handing something back and knowing it ended up making someone happy is a satisfying feeling whether they thank you or not.

Another way of looking at it is this: you have one shot at life and to make an impact be it positive or negative and for most of us, that will be our legacy.

 

[Tirilej]

Treat other people how you want to be treated yourself is my philosophy. Plus handing something back and knowing it ended up making someone happy is a satisfying feeling whether they thank you or not.

Another way of looking at it is this: you have one shot at life and to make an impact be it positive or negative and for most of us, that will be our legacy.

Amen to that :notworthy:notworthy:notworthy

How I wish we all could think like that. The most important thing is that we at least are trying. I am really trying, and I hope I make a difference for someone, somewhere, sometime

 

[Mouche12]

This is about other people's honesty in the street...

A few years back I withdrew € 300 from an ATM. Was way too preoccupied (apparently), crossed the streat to buy cigs, wanted to pay and saw there was no money in my wallet.

Went back to the ATM where a guy waved at me with a bank card, asking: is this yours? I said "No, but I did leave € 300 in the machine by mistake". He said: "Oh, another guy just brought it inside the bank. And sure enough, when I identified myself the cashier handed me over the money.

Lot's of honest people in Amsterdam!

 

[bigjohn]

In my business (swimming pool service) we work at the homes of some very wealthy people.

I remember years back, maybe late '80s, I was vacuuming a pool that had some leaves collected at the bottom and my vac head got clogged with something. I pulled it up and found this giant neckpiece, something like Cleopatra would wear, with gold and diamonds and it felt like it weighed a ton. I figured it was a fake costume piece. When I was finished I rang the doorbell and gave it to the Lady of the house telling her I found it in the pool. Well, she turned white as a ghost, then red. Turned out it was real and belonged to her teenage daughter and they could not find it for the last few days. She took the piece from me and muttered something about, "wait till she gets home" and closed the door. No thank you, not a ten-spot or nothing like that.

A couple of years later after they were no longer customers of ours I saw the same lady at the local unemployment office waiting for her check. She probably had a job and lost it but even though they were ridiculously wealthy she was still going to get her check. Anyways, they were a miserable bunch, always squabbling amongst themselves out loud for the neighborhood to hear.

Over the years I have found a lot of other stuff and always returned it or left in out on the patio or some-such place like that. Even pocket change.

As for the bag of money scenario, I have given that a lot of thought about what I would do and I think I would keep it and keep my mouth shut! If someone is careless enough to lose a big bag of cash they probably don't really need it or it belongs to some drug dealer. I would probably wait a week or two and see if a story showed up in the paper or the news about a little old lady who lost it going to pay her mortgage or something and then I would turn it in. Otherwise, I would launder it and help some poor soul (me) with it.

Don't hate, just being honest.

 

[suzecat]

Very cool posts people. The folks who posted about "doing unto others" did not surprise me. I kinda knew I was hanging with ultra cool people. Glad to be a part of your world! :notworthy

 

[jetset]

I think this thread illustrates as a microcosm of folks' attitudes that there is still a lot of honesty and goodness around despite the diet of negative news we are bombarded with through the media, which so tends to skew perspectives.

I would bet that most of us have personally encountered many small instances where the kindness and integrity of others has been exhibited, be it returning a lost personal item or bag, stuff left behind at the bank or shop etc.

It makes for good, positive reading and a great way to start the day imo.

 

[maphesto]

A lot of years ago, on my way home from work, I stopped to fill up the car. When I was done with that I drove the 2 km home and parked my car and went inside. At the same moment I closed the door at home I felt something was wrong. I couldn't understand what it was, I just felt it. I checked the apartment all over, found nothing strange. When I finally, after 10 minutes or so, gave it a rest and sat down at the TV I realized it. Holy Shit, I forgot to pay for the gas.

In panic, I ran out to the car, drove as fast as I could back to the quite big gas station. Ran inside and luckily I was the only customer at that time. I told the man behind the counter that I was here 25 minutes earlier and forgot to pay for my gas. He smiled and said: I know, I saw it. And why didn't you call the police?, I asked. We always wait up to an hour if we think it's one of those stressed people on their way home from work.

Today at the same gas station, and at all other gas stations near, there are big signs that says that no gas pumps will be started before ID or money is showed to the staff. Most people pay with their card out at the fuel pump but those who want to buy a newspaper or a hot dog together with their gas have to wait for the staff to start your fuel pump. Signs says that late nights the door is locked and you have to pay through a small window.

Something happened between the time of my story and present.

 

[schmooze]

This isn't a particular incident... but in this day and age elderly people are robbed often. We don't carry cash like in the old days so older people forget that when they put their pin numbers into eftpos and atm's anyone behind them can see the pin entered.

So I have a whisper in their ears that they need to put a hand over the eftpos machine... or make sure no one is up close behind them at the atm.

I hope this helps (and no unscrupulous person takes advantage of a vulnerable person!!!)

 

[vinylweatherman]

A lot of years ago, on my way home from work, I stopped to fill up the car. When I was done with that I drove the 2 km home and parked my car and went inside. At the same moment I closed the door at home I felt something was wrong. I couldn't understand what it was, I just felt it. I checked the apartment all over, found nothing strange. When I finally, after 10 minutes or so, gave it a rest and sat down at the TV I realized it. Holy Shit, I forgot to pay for the gas.

In panic, I ran out to the car, drove as fast as I could back to the quite big gas station. Ran inside and luckily I was the only customer at that time. I told the man behind the counter that I was here 25 minutes earlier and forgot to pay for my gas. He smiled and said: I know, I saw it. And why didn't you call the police?, I asked. We always wait up to an hour if we think it's one of those stressed people on their way home from work.

Today at the same gas station, and at all other gas stations near, there are big signs that says that no gas pumps will be started before ID or money is showed to the staff. Most people pay with their card out at the fuel pump but those who want to buy a newspaper or a hot dog together with their gas have to wait for the staff to start your fuel pump. Signs says that late nights the door is locked and you have to pay through a small window.

Something happened between the time of my story and present.

Inflation. Price of "gas" is absolutely ridiculous. It has produced a class who intentionally fill up and drive off without paying, so the stations had to do something to prevent it. They use CCTV to get the registration of every car that fills up, so if anyone fills up and drives off, there is a chance they can be traced. Pay at pump machines will not dispense until the payment card has been verified and authorised for a figure high enough to cater for the biggest fill that anyone could want. The pump also cuts off when that limit is reached as there have been cases where people have fitted additional capacity in the back of a car and van so that they can steal more each fill, as well as catch the attendant by surprise with the amount of fuel that manages to fit in.

Despite all these measures, the problem is still growing as scammers find new ways around, such as fixing false plates so that the CCTV is rendered useless in tracing the offender.

 

[vinylweatherman]

So good to see that there are others that think like this. I've always told my kids exactly this.. "Don't lie to me. If I find out that you've lied to me, I'll have a very hard time trusting you again. If you tell me the truth, even though you may get in trouble, I guarantee it'll be a lot less trouble than you would get in if I catch you in a lie." My kids are very open with me (crossing fingers it stays that way).

I've walked out of a grocery store before, and when I got to the car, I noticed my daughter had a 75c ring pop in her hand. I asked her where she got it from, and she just looked at me. I asked if she had taken it from inside, and she wouldn't answer. Well I know that I didn't pay for it, and she was only 3, so she certainly didn't pay for it, so I loaded the groceries in the car, and walked back inside and made her give it to the cashier. The woman looked at me like I was crazy! It really upset me to see her reaction. I was trying to teach my daughter a lesson, and the cashier looked at me like 'are you serious?' ... I will continue doing it - hoping I never have to lol - because to me, teaching my children right and wrong, is far more important to me than anyones reaction.

Pompous and lazy cashier. What starts as a 75c sweet at the age of 3 could be several dollars worth by the age of 13, and partly down to the attitude that thieving from that store is no big deal, and how dare you try to bother the busy cashier with such trivia.

I have my great niece and nephew for a few weeks in the holidays, and they have been taught that nothing can be opened and eaten until it has been paid for at the till. If they were to get caught with something I would confiscate it if I didn't see it itemised on the receipt, and curse the fact that the little ******* had slipped that one by me

What they do now is sneak things into the trolley, hoping they will get paid for before I spot it on the conveyor and remove it. It seems the younger generation don't see a problem with letting their bored kids graze as they walk around the store, which at best means making sure the empty wrapper gets scanned (honesty), or at worst just gets dumped on some random shelf, which fortunately does not seem to be that often.

The problem is that a lax attitude when they are young can lead to a lax attitude when they are older, which may make them feel that nicking low value items is no big deal.

 

[schmooze]

Pompous and lazy cashier. What starts as a 75c sweet at the age of 3 could be several dollars worth by the age of 13, and partly down to the attitude that thieving from that store is no big deal, and how dare you try to bother the busy cashier with such trivia.

I have my great niece and nephew for a few weeks in the holidays, and they have been taught that nothing can be opened and eaten until it has been paid for at the till. If they were to get caught with something I would confiscate it if I didn't see it itemised on the receipt, and curse the fact that the little ******* had slipped that one by me

What they do now is sneak things into the trolley, hoping they will get paid for before I spot it on the conveyor and remove it. It seems the younger generation don't see a problem with letting their bored kids graze as they walk around the store, which at best means making sure the empty wrapper gets scanned (honesty), or at worst just gets dumped on some random shelf, which fortunately does not seem to be that often.

The problem is that a lax attitude when they are young can lead to a lax attitude when they are older, which may make them feel that nicking low value items is no big deal.

Yeh I'd slap em too granddad....