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Bill Cosby for President

Discussion in 'Political Rants' started by RobWin, Sep 18, 2008.

    Sep 18, 2008
  1. RobWin

    RobWin closed account

    Occupation:
    Who knows?
    Location:
    A Vault!
    Bill Cosby for President


    I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE.

    HERE IS MY PLATFORM:

    (1) 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

    (2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports.
    We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

    (3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

    (4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.

    (5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.


    (6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade.

    (7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life.

    (8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

    (9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

    (10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

    (11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress.

    (12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

    Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes but a vote for me will get you better than what you have, and better than what you're gonna get. Thanks for listening, and remember to write in my name on the ballot in November.

    God Bless America !!!!!!!!!!!

    Bill Cosby!!!!!!!!
     
    2 people like this.
  2. Sep 18, 2008
  3. winbig

    winbig Keep winning this amount. webby PABnononaccred

    Occupation:
    Bum
    Location:
    Pennsylvania
    We all know Bill Cosby is a nut, but even he wouldn't stick his head out for that :)

    You must register/login in order to see the link.

    But I love most of the points, especially 9-12.
     
  4. Sep 18, 2008
  5. RobWin

    RobWin closed account

    Occupation:
    Who knows?
    Location:
    A Vault!
    Yea, I figured as much about it being an email joke but you have to admit no matter who wrote all that it all is great points...
     
  6. Sep 18, 2008
  7. GGW Laurie

    GGW Laurie Dormant account webmeister

    Occupation:
    Self Employed
    Location:
    In the Beautiful South !!
    and i was ready to change my vote:D joke or not, all dang good points as most of working class americans would agree:thumbsup:good one rob:D............laurie
     
  8. Sep 18, 2008
  9. GrandMaster

    GrandMaster Ueber Meister CAG

    Occupation:
    Mathematician by day, online gambler by night.
    Location:
    UK
    It looks like the communists only failed in the US because they failed to add some xenophobic ideas to their programme.
    A few specific points that may be worth mentioning (I know it is a joke):
    Little known fact: the US has no official language.
    It would be interesting to see how the more than 50% cut in oil consumption worked out.
    Good luck selling it at that price, currently the world can get a bushel of wheat elsewhere for about 1/20 of the price of a barrel of oil.
     
    1 person likes this.

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