The Secret Crush
Posted 15th June 2008 at 04:13 PM by babs7262
THE SECRET CRUSH
The Year was 1985 I was so excited to be buying my first home. It was my one year anniversary as we were moving in and we were both so happy. The home was quite far from my job, which was near the home I lived in with both of my parents. Everything was going well the first 6 months and all of a sudden I was getting pains in my stomach and severe headaches. I thought it was the stress of my job so I quit my job.
My husband (at the time) was a sales rep for Pitney Bowes and had a territory near our new home. He became friendly with a co-worker named Eddie. Eddie was the type of guy everyone liked. He was handsome, drove a nice sports car and was single. My husband was 10 years older than me and Eddie was closer to my age.
Boy, my stomach was getting worse. The pain so bad that I was throwing up on a regular basis. I began going to the Dr's for tests. I was in and out of labs for weeks.
My last test was with a woman doctor. She asked me a very simple question. "Are you happily married?" she asked. I paused and said yes, knowing that I was becoming more miserable as each day went by. You see my husband was an ex football player with the hopes of being drafted by the Minnesota Vikings. It was the 3rd quarter of the last game and he ran into the goal post and blew his knee. Five surgeries later he found out he could no longer play. He used Jack Daniels as a therapist and me as a gym punching bag (not punch actually, more like hitting,grabbing,throwing things)
As Jack began to be a bigger part of my husband's life, I was getting sicker and sicker. At the same time cocaine was becoming very popular and Eddie just couldnt stop. He would come over with his problems more and more and I began to feel bad for him. He was so helpless. He checked himself into a rehab. When it was time for him to be able to have visitors I found myself driving over to the rehab each visiting day. I think my husband knew I had a crush on Eddie before I did. I found myself doing my hair and make up nicer and dressing with flair on those visiting days.
My husband said one morning "Why do you dress up to visit Eddie, you like him or something?" I said of course not, knowing deep down inside that he was right, I did have a crush on Eddie. My marriage was really falling apart and my mother's cancer was getting worse. They went to PA to visit relatives on Labor Day and never came back because my mom knew it was getting closer to her death and wanted to be with her family. I was in Illinois with my husband. I was sick and depressed, I didnt know what to do, stay with my husband or go to PA until my mother passed and spend every minute with her that I could.
A few months went by, Eddie was out of Rehab and had no place to stay. My husband asked me if it was ok if Eddie stayed here. I reluctantly said yes. I think my husband felt my crush on Eddie because he changed his mind and told Eddie he couldnt stay with us. My mother was getting worse by Easter time in 1986. They found a tumor in her head. I was flying back and forth to PA.
One day I called Eddie at work. This was my plan: I was going to tell him that I had something important to talk to him about. He was gonna come over and when he did, I was going to tell him how I felt about him. I don't know why, even though I no longer loved my husband, I was brought up to be faithful and keep my vows. I was so sick and depressed at the moment I called that after I hung up and he was on his way I got scared
Eddie came to the door. I let him in. I said to myself "ok, this is it, do or die" I opened my mouth to tell him that I had feelings for him and instead I said "is my husband having an affair, I have a feeling he is?" Eddie said "no, why would you think that?" I didnt know what to say because it was just a question to cover up the real reason for his coming over. I just said "well, i dont think our marriage is going well, that's all" Eddie must of felt what I really wanted to say because he said right away " I better go"
Two weeks (sometime in late March) my husband and I went to PA to spend easter with my parents. My husband left the day after easter and I never went back to Illinois. My secret crush on Eddie was left behind in Illinois. My mother passed a few months later on July 21st, I got divorced on August 6th (my 3rd anniversary to the day) and I no longer had an ulcer or headaches.
The Year was 1985 I was so excited to be buying my first home. It was my one year anniversary as we were moving in and we were both so happy. The home was quite far from my job, which was near the home I lived in with both of my parents. Everything was going well the first 6 months and all of a sudden I was getting pains in my stomach and severe headaches. I thought it was the stress of my job so I quit my job.
My husband (at the time) was a sales rep for Pitney Bowes and had a territory near our new home. He became friendly with a co-worker named Eddie. Eddie was the type of guy everyone liked. He was handsome, drove a nice sports car and was single. My husband was 10 years older than me and Eddie was closer to my age.
Boy, my stomach was getting worse. The pain so bad that I was throwing up on a regular basis. I began going to the Dr's for tests. I was in and out of labs for weeks.
My last test was with a woman doctor. She asked me a very simple question. "Are you happily married?" she asked. I paused and said yes, knowing that I was becoming more miserable as each day went by. You see my husband was an ex football player with the hopes of being drafted by the Minnesota Vikings. It was the 3rd quarter of the last game and he ran into the goal post and blew his knee. Five surgeries later he found out he could no longer play. He used Jack Daniels as a therapist and me as a gym punching bag (not punch actually, more like hitting,grabbing,throwing things)
As Jack began to be a bigger part of my husband's life, I was getting sicker and sicker. At the same time cocaine was becoming very popular and Eddie just couldnt stop. He would come over with his problems more and more and I began to feel bad for him. He was so helpless. He checked himself into a rehab. When it was time for him to be able to have visitors I found myself driving over to the rehab each visiting day. I think my husband knew I had a crush on Eddie before I did. I found myself doing my hair and make up nicer and dressing with flair on those visiting days.
My husband said one morning "Why do you dress up to visit Eddie, you like him or something?" I said of course not, knowing deep down inside that he was right, I did have a crush on Eddie. My marriage was really falling apart and my mother's cancer was getting worse. They went to PA to visit relatives on Labor Day and never came back because my mom knew it was getting closer to her death and wanted to be with her family. I was in Illinois with my husband. I was sick and depressed, I didnt know what to do, stay with my husband or go to PA until my mother passed and spend every minute with her that I could.
A few months went by, Eddie was out of Rehab and had no place to stay. My husband asked me if it was ok if Eddie stayed here. I reluctantly said yes. I think my husband felt my crush on Eddie because he changed his mind and told Eddie he couldnt stay with us. My mother was getting worse by Easter time in 1986. They found a tumor in her head. I was flying back and forth to PA.
One day I called Eddie at work. This was my plan: I was going to tell him that I had something important to talk to him about. He was gonna come over and when he did, I was going to tell him how I felt about him. I don't know why, even though I no longer loved my husband, I was brought up to be faithful and keep my vows. I was so sick and depressed at the moment I called that after I hung up and he was on his way I got scared
Eddie came to the door. I let him in. I said to myself "ok, this is it, do or die" I opened my mouth to tell him that I had feelings for him and instead I said "is my husband having an affair, I have a feeling he is?" Eddie said "no, why would you think that?" I didnt know what to say because it was just a question to cover up the real reason for his coming over. I just said "well, i dont think our marriage is going well, that's all" Eddie must of felt what I really wanted to say because he said right away " I better go"
Two weeks (sometime in late March) my husband and I went to PA to spend easter with my parents. My husband left the day after easter and I never went back to Illinois. My secret crush on Eddie was left behind in Illinois. My mother passed a few months later on July 21st, I got divorced on August 6th (my 3rd anniversary to the day) and I no longer had an ulcer or headaches.
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